I Will Make You Epic(Wait For It)Dary!
by omnidestruction5678
Summary: After getting a letter from his friends bragging about their students, Gildarts decides he needs one of his own. Luckily, our favorite, impressionable, Fire Dragon Slayer could use a teacher. Watch as Natsu is taken under Gildarts wing to become, Epic(wait for it)dary! Natsu/harem, multiple crossovers, deviant Wendy, vengeful Cana, Falcon Punches, with a lot of crack and craziness.


Hi everyone, here is the first chapter for I will make you Epic (Wait For it) Dary. I wanted this fic to show a Natsu who received training and actually remember his power ups, not a Natsu who gained Lightning Flame Dragon Mode but apparently forgets he had it against certain characters cough (Future Rouge). This Natsu will gain different abilities and powers but he will master them, so instead of multiple power ups, he will have an arsenal of moves that he will master and will be able to use in combat. This will feature a multitude of crossover, with Natsu learning different skills or attracting certain women's eyes. Some of them might be one time things, some could be more, it kinda depends if I feel they would be a nice pairing with Natsu or if you all, the readers, enjoyed their interactions.

Anyway, this first chapter is packed with memes, songs, and references, so if you find few; feel free to have some internet. Anyway enjoy.

_Italics_ mean thoughts

**Bold** mean moves or key words

Disclaimer: I own nothing in this story.

* * *

Gildarts Clive was mad.

How did you know he was mad?

Because the city of Magnolia was shifting back and forth to avoid being destroyed by his rampaging Crush magic, sending people screaming for safety.

Yet, what exactly could have pushed the Crush mage to the point where he lost his perfect control of his magic?

* * *

Flashback:

Gildarts smiled handsomely as he stood in front of the 2nd grade class. Recently, Fairy Tail was contacted by a local elementary school, asking for them to send a member to present what being a mage is like to the second grade class.

Being the awesome that he is, Gildarts volunteered to do the job. Everyone know that Gildarts Clive was always a great role model for children!

It had nothing to do with the ridiculously hot teachers that work in the school, and the strongly locked coffee rooms that had walls that could muffle most sounds.

"Hi kids! My name is Gildarts Clive and I am an S-Class mage of Fairy Tail! I-"

"Don't you mean you are a gay mage of gay tail!" spoke a rude little boy with spikey brown hair with red stripes on his cheeks, with a pale brown shirt, brown shorts, and black sandals.

Gildarts frowned at that, "I'm sorry little boy, but didn't your mother teach you it's rude to interrupt someone when their talking?"

"Yeah, but your gay!"

"I'm not gay!" yelled a frustrated Gildarts.

"Uh-huh"

"Un-unh"

"Uh-huh!"

"Un-unh!"

"Mr. Clive! Kiba! Please stop this at once!" spoke the teacher, who desperately tried to stop the silly argument.

"But he started it!" whined Gildarts as he pointed at Kiba.

Kiba smirked, "Hey, I am just stating facts! Those shoes and those pants say you get pounded in the butt, making you gay, you stupid he-bitch!"

"WHY YOU LITTLE!" roared Gildarts as he lunged for the boy, only to be stopped by the teacher.

"Mr. Clive! Please control yourself!" as she struggled to hold the man back. When Gildarts finally calmed down, she whispered in his ear, "He plays kickball every day after school, get him then!"

Gildarts nodded grimly as he glared at the little boy.

End flashback.

* * *

Along with his horrible morning, he was unable to score with any of the teachers because apparently, trying to crush the head of annoying brats was frowned upon. As he left the schools, a courier walked up to him to deliver two letters addressed to him. He realized the letters were from his two buddies, Namikaze Minato and Straw-hat Shanks, bragging about one's respective son and the other's new apprentice.

That was the straw that broke the camel's back.

Out of the trio, he was the only one that didn't have a son or apprentice to carry on his legacy! When he died, hopeful by dying of blood loss and exhaustion after having a marathon orgy with the women of Mermaid Tail, he would have no one to continue his legacy of drinking, having unimaginable sex with beautiful women, and continuing the epicness that was his life.

So deep in thought, Gildarts had yet to notice that he had entered Fairy Tail and was currently swatting away a six year old Natsu who simply returned to continue trying to land a punch on the S-class mage.

Noticing Macao and Wakaba sitting and enjoying a round of drinks, he decided to join them.

"Gildarts!" shouted Macao as he motioned for his friend to sit. "How was your day?"

"Shitty! Apparently, it's against the law to rearrange a second-graders face if you are an adult!" By this point Gildarts had forgotten to smack Natsu away, leading the young dragon-slayer to wail on the adult's head.

"At least you can legally be around kids." muttered Wakaba as he nursed his drink.

"What do you mean?" asked Gildarts.

Wakaba frowned, "Look, to make a long story short, let just say that just because someone says they're a midget and single does not mean that they are a midget. They could be a little girl whose parents are extremely angry that a grown man was at their front door asking to take their daughter, who was not a midget, out on a date. The nerve of some people."

Gildarts and Macao simply stared at Wakaba, before deciding to ignore him and go back to their conversation.

"Why do you want to go beat up some kid, Gildarts?"

"Because some stupid kid had the gall to call me gay, me! Gildarts Clive! The sexiest man in Magnolia and the sex object for hundreds of women, gay! And apparently the law says you can't beat up kids if you are an adult."

"Or date them!" threw in Wakaba.

Deciding to ignore him, Gildarts frowned as he pondered a solution to his problem, before finally realizing what has been giving him a headache was the dragon slayer stuck to his head.

"Natsu! Get off of my head!"

"Not unless you take me serious and fight me!"

This moment would be the moment that changed the future of Fairy Tail.

When challenged to a spar by Natsu, Gildarts would have simply blow Natsu off and be on his way. Yet, already being slightly ticked off, Gildarts did the one thing that nobody expected him to do.

He accepted Natsu's challenge.

"Fine then, brat. Let take this outside."

"Alright! I'm all fired up!"

Nodding, Gildarts rose from his seat and headed for the door, Natsu holding on to his neck.

* * *

Outside:

Gildarts and Natsu stood across the training field as they faced each other down.

Gildarts sighed as he sat down, Indian-style on the ground. "Start whenever you're ready, Natsu."

Natsu nodded before rushing toward Gildarts. When he was within punching range, Gildarts simply raised a close fist, catching Natsu off guard, and simply flicked Natsu on the forehead.

With that one flick, Gildarts managed to send Natsu flying back, breaking a hole through the guild wall and still having enough force to punch through the opposite wall on the other side of the guild and into the street.

"Natsu!" cried Lisanna as she ran to check on her crush.

"Who did that!?" shouted Erza before noticing Gildarts stepping through the hole in the wall, "Gildarts, did you punch Natsu through a wall!?"

"Not really punch, more like flicked." said a sheepish Gildarts.

Erza scowled as she marched up to the giant of a man, "How can you be so irresponsible!? You know Natsu is too weak to fight you in any way!"

Before Erza could continue her rant, wheezing filled the room causing everyone to turn around to see a heavily breathing Natsu limp his way into the room, a nasty bruise on his forehead from where Gildarts hit him.

"Nice hit Gildarts. I really felt that one." said Natsu as he finally got Lisanna to stop fretting over him. "Okay, let's throw down."

"Natsu what are you doing! You can't fight Gildarts!" reprimanded Erza as she stood in front of Natsu to stop him from fighting Gildarts.

"I don't care Erza. Gildarts is finally giving me the chance to prove myself and I plan on taking it."

"What do you mean Natsu?" asked Erza.

Natsu frowned, "When Igneel left me, and I promised myself I would find him someday. In order to do that, I have to become stronger, strong enough to face opponents stronger than me by a hundred folds. Right now, Gildarts is the strongest active member in Fairy Tail, I know I can't beat him, but if I can get him to even flinch, I know that I am on the right path to get stronger and eventually finding Igneel. So, Erza; either you can get out of my way willingly or I can move you by force, because you're in my way and I have a fight to win!"

"Natsu, I can't let you do this, I care about you too much to let you get hurt like this!" cried Erza as she refused to move.

"Erza. Let him through."

This caught everyone by surprise as they turned to look at Gildarts, who had a somber expression on his face.

"If Natsu needs this fight that bad, I will not refuse him, but know this Natsu, I will not hold back."

Natsu grinned as he made his way around Erza only for her to grab his arm.

"Natsu, please. This isn't fighting me or Gray. This is a fight on a whole different level, you could really get hurt." she pleaded.

"Erza. Let him go."

Erza turned to where the voice came from, only to see Makarov standing at the top of the steps looking down on them.

"But master, please!"

"Erza, this is Natsu's fight and not yours. If you and Natsu switched positions, you would not want him to stop you."

Erza frowned ready to protest, when she felt a hand grab her free hand. She looked to see Natsu releasing her grip on his arm and now holding both of her hands.

Erza couldn't help but blush as Natsu grinned at her. "Erza, trust me. I know what I'm doing."

Not trusting herself to speak, Erza simply nodded as Natsu released her hands.

Grinning, Natsu walked around Erza to stand a few feet from Gildarts, who now stood on his feet, and staring Natsu down.

The guild slowly filtered out of the building and onto the sidelines of the training grounds to watch the match, interested to see how the match would transpire.

It seem that an eternity had passed as Natsu and Gildarts stared each other down, before Natsu took off, flames surrounding his fist as he charged Gildarts.

Once he got in range, Natsu leaped into the air and swung at Gildarts's face. Gildarts calmly tilted his head to the side, causing Natsu to fly past him, but instead of letting Natsu finish his path, Gildarts reached up and grabbed Natsu's ankle.

"_If he wanted a real match, I'll give him one!"_ thought Gildarts.

Natsu was shocked as he stopped in midair; before his world was turned upside down as Gildarts slammed him into the ground repeatedly, slamming Natsu into the ground hard enough to leave craters in the ground.

Erza winched as she saw Natsu being slammed into the ground, helpless to do anything, as Makarov made sure to sit beside her to stop her from interfering.

"Wow!" whistled Mirajane, "Gildarts is really fighting!"

This was a surprise to everyone in the guild, because Gildarts never did much in any spar against anyone in the guild. He would usually let his opponent get a few hits on him before finishing the match in one punch.

To see Gildarts actually fight someone and not try to beat them in one punch.

It was unheard of.

"Hey, Erza." called Mirajane from her spot between her siblings, "You might want to start looking for another boy toy, because your old one is going to be lucky if he can blink after Gildarts in finished with him!"

Erza bit her lip, hard enough to draw blood, as she withstood Mirajane teasing, unable to do anything with Makarov beside her.

"You know," said Makarov as one of the waitress brought him a beer, "I wanted to make sure you didn't interrupt Natsu and Gildarts match, but, I pretty sure that as long as you didn't cross my field of vision, any other fight you get in… well maybe I don't notice."

Erza glanced quizzically at Makarov, before realization dawned on her. Grinning, Erza quickly hugged Makarov before turning to grin evilly at Mirajane. Before Mirajane could even blink, Erza tackled Mirajane to the ground and proceeded to beat the stuffing out of Mirajane while she had the advantage.

Makarov couldn't help but grin as the two rivals fought, before turning back to Natsu and Gildarts fight.

Not paying attention to what happened on the sidelines; Gildarts swung Natsu around above his head before throwing the boy down the field, watching as the dragon slayer hit the ground and slid along the ground, face down.

Everyone watched with bated breath, as the dragon slayer has yet to move from his spot on the ground, fearing the worst.

Relief quickly flooded the guild members as Natsu slowly placed his palm against the ground to push himself up.

Natsu grunted as he spit blood from his mouth as he slowly stood to his feet and turned around.

Everyone ,except Makarov and Gildarts, gasped as they saw Natsu face. His right eye was swollen shut; he had a gash across his forehead that caused blood to run down his face and into his left eye. His nose was broken and his face was covered in dirt, blood, and bruises.

"Gildarts! You are taking this too far!" screamed Macao, horrified by the injuries inflicted upon the young boy by his friend.

"He's right Gildarts! You are going to kill him!" screamed Mirajane, managing to get Erza off her when she heard Lisanna scream, finally noticing the tears her sister was shedding for Natsu. While she didn't care for her sister crush on the boy, she couldn't help but agree that maybe the match was going too far.

While some members tried to reason with Gildarts with their words, other members tried to step onto the field and physically stop Gildarts, only to be stopped by Makarov.

"Gramps, what are you doing!" yelled Laxus as he and a few of his fellow guild members tried to escape Makarov grasp, being held in his titan sized hand. While he didn't care too much for the guild after his father was exiled, even he couldn't stand by and let somebody die, especially a guild member.

"Natsu needs this." Calmly spoke Makarov.

"But he could die!" cried Lisanna as she tried to reason with Makarov.

"That is a risk he must take. Natsu can leave the field at any time he wants, but no one will interfere! Now, sit back and watch!" ordered Makarov.

Reluctantly, the members of Fairy Tail sat back and allowed the match to continue.

Natsu grinned as best he could with his busted lip as he assumed a fighting stance, demonstrating his willingness to fight.

Gildarts couldn't stop the twitch at the corner of his lips as he observed Natsu's determination, before he focused on the match and kept up his serious façade, beckoning for Natsu to come at him.

Grinning, Natsu ignited his fist with his Fire Dragon Slayer Magic, before he charged forward.

Gildarts stood still as Natsu charged him before lashing out with a kick, one that if it connected, would have easily taken Natsu's head off.

Keyword, if.

Natsu, in a moment of fighting genius, used his miniature height as an advantage against Gildarts. Gildarts limbs were long and strong, but, if Natsu could dodge them and continue to press forward, those gaps provided him with an opportunity to hit Gildarts in his weak spots.

Directly under the giant of a man, Natsu cocked his fist back, the flames surrounding his hands glowing brightly, before he throw the hardest punch in all of his life.

Straight at Gildarts balls.

The men on the sidelines winched and covered themselves as they watch their fellow man take a fire-coated punch to his manhood. It didn't matter how strong you were, getting hit there HURT.

Yet, Natsu didn't stop with one punch. Cocking his other fist back, he let loose a torrent of punches into Gildarts's pride and joy, Feeling that he done enough, Natsu hopped back in preparation for the next part of his plan.

When Gildarts doubled over, in so much pain, he couldn't ever scream in agony, Natsu quickly rush forward and delivered a devastating uppercut, hitting Gildarts in the throat, hard enough to lift him into the air.

The members of the guild watched in amazement as Gildarts sailed through the air after Natsu attack, before landing in a heap on the ground.

"I can't believe flame-brain did it!" shouted Grey, with others nodding in agreement.

Natsu actually managed to knock Gildarts Clive, Fairy Tail Mage Extraordinaire, off his feet, and Natsu wasn't even a certified mage yet!

Natsu, after finally realizing what he did, began to cheer and hop up and down as Lisanna and Happy ran over to celebrate with him.

"I DID IT! I DID IT! I AM AWESOME INCARNATE! HEY, I JUST USED A NEW WORD IN A SENTENCE PROPERLY! THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!" screamed Natsu as he hugged Lisanna and Happy who laughed as they cheered for Natsu.

Erza smiled as she walked over to join Natsu celebration and congratulate him, before beating him into paste for making her worry so much.

"It's not over yet." said Makarov, as he nursed his beer.

Mirajane frowned, dusting grass off her outfit, "Wait do you mean, Master?"

"I mean that."

Then they felt it.

An ominous wind filled the air as a shiver crawled down everyone spine. Natsu, Lisanna, and Happy stopped celebrating as they felt a strong pressure pressed down on them, forcing them to pay attention.

Everyone turned to face the source of the power, finally noticing that Gildarts has risen to his feet.

"Natsu, that was a good strategy! You know that you couldn't fight me head on, so you aimed for my weak spots! That was very smart, but this battle isn't over yet. Now, I will ask you, before we go any farther, would you like to forfeit?"

"Natsu," whispered Lisanna, paling from the overbearing magical aura that Gidlarts was projecting, "Maybe you should stop?"

Natsu shook his head, "Not until I win!"

"But you could be seriously hurt!"

"I don't care, I have to stand my ground and finish this fight! Let's go Gildarts!" roared Natsu as he stepped forward.

"Lisanna, come on!" cried Mirajane, as she and Elfman rushed forward to remove Lisanna from the field.

Gildarts chuckled, "Very well, but Natsu, I won't be holding back anymore. I am going to fight you with my full magical power, are you ready?"

Natsu gulped, but nodded.

"Then brace yourself!" roared Gildarts, before his magic exploded. An aura of pure silver coursed around Gildarts as he let his magic run wild, lifting his cloak and hair, giving him the appearance of a monster.

To those that faced him, he was.

Gildarts was not like some of the other mages in Fairy Tail. He dealt with the true monsters in Fiore. Mages who sacrificed children's to raise the dead, demons that filled horror books that waited at night to prey on said readers. Men and women who would not hesitate to rip out the hearts of those that opposed them.

In order to fight those monsters, Gildarts realized that he would have to go all out. He could not hold back, as it would mean instant death, but to fight all out; and if those he fought would not stop, them he would make them stop.

Permanently.

Right now, Natsu was facing down the true magical wrath that was Gildarts Clive.

Natsu began to sweat as his knees began to buckle. Before he knew it, he was on his hands and knees, trembling in front of the monster in front of him. The others were not doing well themselves; many of the children looked as if they were ready to pass out, while the older generation just barely managed to keep their composure.

"Natsu." spoke Gildarts, his voice carrying across the field, "I will offer you a choice; you may forfeit this fight and leave with your life, or you may continue to fight me, but I cannot guarantee you will survive."

Natsu gulped as he stared into the pillar of pure, magical, energy; fear flooding his body at the thought of dying against that monster.

"jeez," whispered Mirajane, shocked out of her usual abrasive attitude, "Gildarts really isn't playing around."

Erza nodded, sadness filling her eyes as she watch Natsu Dragneel, the fire of Fairy Tail, slowly cowed by Gildarts. It hurt her to see him like this, the same boy who never say die attitude kept everyone in the guild morale high and encouraged them to live each day to the fullest, being broken down.

"Natsu." whispered Erza, her heart breaking as she saw Natsu's will begin to crumble.

Laxus frowned as he stood beside his grandfather, "That pink-hair clowned was always annoying and may have been my least favorite person in the guild, but I didn't want to see him like this. Grandfather, can't you do anything?"

Makarov slowly shook his head, struggling to keep the tears in his eye from running down his face as he watched Natsu, only guessing the torment that must have been running through his mind and through his body.

"This is Natsu's fight. We will not interfere. The choice he makes now will shape his future, for better or worse.

Natsu trembled as he kept his eyes on the ground, trying to deal with an emotion he had not felt for so long.

FEAR.

Fear that he was going to die. Fear of being alone. Fear of never being strong enough to protect his friends.

But most of all, the fear that he would never be strong enough to fight for what he believed in.

Natsu has always dreamed of facing Gildarts in a true match. He could finally show the guild what he was made of, that he was worthy of being a mage of Fairy Tail. That he was worthy of being the Fire Dragon Slayer.

That he was strong enough to be Igneel's son.

This was something that kept Natsu awake many nights. That maybe, maybe, if he was stronger, Igneel wouldn't have left him. That maybe, if he tried harder in his training, Igneel would have been proud enough to teach him more.

That maybe, Igneel never considered him as a son, and simply wanted to keep his magical legacy alive.

Natsu's eyes widen in surprise as he felt tears run down his face. He understood where he stood now as his tears fell to the ground. He wasn't good enough. He wasn't good enough to fight Erza or Mirajane. He wasn't good enough to beat Gray or Gildarts. He wasn't good enough to keep Igneel from leaving.

Mind made up, Natsu slowly lowered his head to the ground, ready to offer an apology for challenging Gildarts in the first place.

(Cue Thousand Foot Krutch I Get Wicked)

"_Natsu_." whispered a voice.

Natsu stopped, his forehead mere centimeters from the ground.

He knew that voice and he began to remember.

* * *

Flashback:

A four year old Natsu smiled as he played with a ball that Igneel had brought him from one of his travels. Said dragon was currently laying about in its mountain home, silently observing Natsu, before he spoke.

"Natsu." began the dragon, getting the boys attention, "What do you know about fear?"

Natsu frowned, "What's fear?"

Igneel chuckled, "Fear is something that can stop you from finding your path in life. It is something that can be created physically, but mostly mentally, and it can force you to never reach your dreams."

Natsu eyes widened, "Really?"

Igneel nodded, "Yes. But Natsu, out of everything I taught you, I want you to remember this, as a dragon, I face monsters that are bigger, stronger, and faster than me. Yet, I cannot cower before them, because if I do, they will attack those that I hold closely, mainly you." Natsu nodded to show he was still paying attention. "As the Fire Dragon Slayer and as the son of Igneel, Natsu you will face opponents who are stronger, family, and willing to do whatever needs to be done to defeat you. They will make you fear them, to be terrified of them, and when they do, you have two options; you can either run or face your face as the SON OF IGNEEL!" roared the Dragon as his magical flames exploded off of him wrapping him and Natsu in their warmth.

"Natsu, to achieve your goals, you must not let fear rule your life. Use the flames I have taught you to burn away your fears and face your future! Use them to stand up for those who cannot stand up for themselves! Use them to stop those that use their powers to torment others! Natsu, as the Fire Dragon Slayer, use your flames as your sword and shield to combat your fears and stand on your own! Do you understand me, my son?"

Natsu sat in awe as the flames danced around him, before he looked towards the Dragon and simply said, "I understand."

Igneel nodded as his flames continued to rage, his teeth on display in the form of a dragon like smile, "Then I have nothing else to teach you, my son."

* * *

Flashback ended.

Natsu eyes widened in understand as he recalled the lesson his father taught him. If he bowed to his fears now, he would never be able to stop.

"I...I... I won't bow." whispered Natsu as he struggled to rise to his feet. "I won't let my fear stop me from protecting the ones I care for. I won't let my fear stop me from finding Igneel. I won't let my fear stop me from becoming one of the strongest mages in Fiore."

Gildarts simply watched as Natsu slowly stood up, his magical power slowly beginning to push against Gildarts own. Gildarts was surprised as he watched scales begin to grow along Natsu's arm and face.

"I can't lose to you and I can't lose to my fear!" roared Natsu as he stood to his feet, his flames circling his body.

"As long as I can draw breath, I will fight! I am a dragon and I WILL NEVER LOSE TO MY FEAR!" roared Natsu as his flames exploded.

"Holy crap!" said Gray as he shielded his face from the harsh flames of Natsu's fire. Natsu could no longer be seen as his magic soared into the air, shielding him from view. Risking a glance, Gray lowered his arm to glance at the young dragon slayer.

"_That can't be."_ thought Gray, as he watched the torrent of flames that was Natsu magic rise into the air, just shy of reaching Gildart's own magical level. "_His magic level… it's over 9000!"_

Everyone shared Gray's thought as they watch the young Dragon-Slayer roar from with the eruption of his power.

Gildarts couldn't help but smile as he watched Natsu pushed his power to the limit and then something. As he watched, he noticed that Natsu flames were slowly turning from reddish-orange to a golden yellow, with blue electricity racing around his magic.

"_No way! Natsu couldn't be a …., but we never did learn who Natsu's parents were, so maybe_." Gildarts nodded, having a sneaky suspicion of the identity of Natsu's father.

Deciding to end this once and for all, Gildarts spoke up, "Natsu! So you managed to conquer your fear, good for you! But words don't mean much on the battlefield! Come at me with all you got!"

Gildarts watched as Natsu's flame began to lower, allowing everyone to finally catch a glimpse of Natsu.

"_Yep!"_ thought Gildarts,_ "I definitely know who Natsu father is!"_

The dragonslayer stood amongst the rolling flames of his magic. He now had scales covering his arms and around his eyes, and his eyes seemed to have sharpened. What stood out the most about the Natsu weren't his scales, but his physique. Everyone knew that Natsu was in shape, his body growing with new muscles every day, but now, it was astonishing.

Natsu entire body had a flickering golden sheen around it, his muscles seemed to have grown, farther demonstrating his physique to the crowd. His hair seemed spikier then it usually was, and for some reason seemed lighter.

Natsu didn't waste any time talking as he lowered himself into a fighting stance, which Gildarts matched. Everyone watched with bated breath as the two stared each other down.

Then, they charged. Natsu with his fist covered in fire and Gildarts with his fist covered in crash magic. As the two titans approached each other, both of them roared as their fists collided, a shockwave erupting from the contact.

Makarov eyes widened before he quickly used his Titan Magic to grow his arms and used them to make a shield for the rest of the guild.

Natsu growled as his fist pressed against Gildarts, waves of Fire Magic and Crash Magic surging outward scorching and destroying any land it touched.

While Natsu struggled to hold his own, Gildarts simply smiled as he watched the dragon slayer.

"I am proud of you, Natsu. You stood your ground and challenged me to a fight! Even now, you continued to fight against me. When you wake up, we will have to talk."

Natsu frowned, "When I wake up?"

That was until he saw Gildarts raise his other fist.

"_Oh crap!"_ though Natsu, moments before the fist made impact.

* * *

Later on that day:

Natsu groaned as he woke up, his head feeling like Happy decided to use his head for bongos again.

Finally gaining his bearings, Natsu took the chance to look around the room, instantly knowing it wasn't his.

Why?

Because he could actually see the floor.

"You're in the medical wing."

Natsu jumped, before look towards the origin of the voice, "ERZA!"

Erza simply nodded, "How are you feeling?"

"I am feeling pretty good. I'm a bit bruised but" WHAM "Ow! What was that for?"

Erza glared at Natsu, who was currently rubbing his head, "That was for being stupid enough to challenge Gildarts to a fight, you idiot!"

"But-"

"But nothing! Natsu, you nearly died out there! You pushed your body to its limits and then some! If master didn't call in his friend to come and heal you, you wouldn't be here talking right now!"

"But Erza, I-

"What Natsu? What could you say that would justify your behavior?"

"Will you stop treating me like I'm weak!"

Erza blinked, "What? I don't treat you that!"

"Yes, you do Erza! Ever since I been here, you always treated me like I was weak! Like I couldn't fend for myself! Everyone here did! I was always thought of as the knucklehead, the kid that always messed up, that always destroyed everything. The only person who doesn't treat me like that is Lisanna!"

Erza frowned, never really considering how her actions affected Natsu, "Natsu, I never know."

"No one did! Everyone always thought of me as the idiot. Well, I am not! I wanted to fight Gildarts because I wanted a chance to see how strong I really was. I wanted to see if maybe I could have stood a chance. Erza, I thought out every move I could have made that could have possibly hurt him, and you know what, it worked! I managed to knock Gildarts flat on his back! Me! That something that most people couldn't say!"

Erza couldn't help but smile at Natsu's statement. The fact that he managed to actually knock Gildarts off his feet was something nobody expected of him.

"Erza, I am sorry if I worried you, but I needed this. I needed to know that I have the potential to be stronger, that one day, I will be strong enough to protect the people I care about, especially you."

Erza couldn't help but blush at Natsu statement. It reminded her of one of the hero lines to the girl he loves in one of her romance novels. Not trusting herself to speak, Erza reached and pulled Natsu into a hug, one he readily returned.

That was until the sound of someone clearing their throat interrupted their moment.

Erza quickly let go of Natsu, straightening her clothes, and trying to remove that damnable blush from her face.

"Ah, it seems my apprentice it just like his master, always trying to get into girl's pants."

Erza and Natsu blushed bright red at that, as the crash mage laughed and walked over to Natsu's bed.

"I am just kidding, how are you feeling Natsu?"

"I am okay, Gildarts."

"Good, then we can get you packed up and be on our way."

"What!" cried Natsu and Erza.

"What!" cried the rest of the guild, who were hanging around the door to listen in on the conversation.

"What do you mean 'be on our way'?" asked Erza.

Gildarts sighed, "I guess it would be easier to announce it now. I have decided to take Natsu on as my apprentice."

"What?!" screamed the guild.

"Really?" asked Natsu, to which Gildarts nodded, "FUCK YEAH!"

"NATSU!" reprimanded Erza, "Anyway, why do you want to take Natsu anyway?"

Gildarts grinned, "During our fight, I noticed that Natsu has the potential to become a great mage. He can think on his feet, he managed to face his fear, and he has a raw amount of magical energy that could be molded to use a wide variety of moves."

"Well, yeah," said Erza, "But Laxus, Mirajane, and I can do all of that! You don't have to take Natsu."

Gildarts shook his head, "Actually Erza, you all have not met all of the requirements that I have listed. While you all are powerful, you all have fears that keep you from pushing yourself to be the best that you could be. In fact, Natsu was the only one in this guild that has actually challenged me to a fight and managed to not only knocked me off of my feet, but stood up and faced me when I used half of my power."

Gildarts walked over to Natsu and placed a hand on Natsu shoulder, "Natsu, reminded me of me when I was his age. Annoying, destructive, but willing to push himself to the limit to find his strength and use it to protect others. Natsu, with me as your teacher, you can be one of the strongest mages in history."

"Really!?" asked Natsu, loving the idea that he could be that strong.

"Wait a second!" yelled Laxus, "I know for a fact that I am stronger than Natsu. I am the strongest mage under adulthood in here. If anyone is supposed to get any kind of training, it's me!"

Gildarts shook his head, "I can't train you Laxus."

"Why not?"

"Because you are an asshole. I am a dick and Natsu is a dick, I am obliged to train him."

"Okay, now I am confused." said Mirajane.

"Let me explain." said Gildarts, "There are three types of people in the world, Dicks, Assholes, and Pussies. Natsu and I are dicks, Laxus is an asshole, and Erza and Mirajane are pussies, reason why, their girls and have that by default." Erza and Mirajane glared at Gildarts for the sexist comment. "As dicks, we are needed to fuck the assholes and pussies of the world."

"Wait a second." said Natsu, his face paling, "I am supposed to fuck Laxus in the ass!"

"HELL NO!" screamed Erza and Laxus, before Erza punched Laxus in the mouth. When later asked, Erza would simply respond that she did it to make sure that Laxus wouldn't get any ideas.

She didn't do it because she was jealous. Erza Scarlett couldn't be jealous that someone else could receive Natsu affection.

"The only person that is going to get fucked in the ass by Natsu is me!" yelled Erza.

Yep, definitely not jealous.

Slowly realizing what she said, Erza face quickly matched the color of her hair as she was currently wishing she had the power to melt into the floor.

"Ah," said Gildarts, "You already have your first tsundere. I know making you my apprentice was a good idea. Anyway, Natsu, there are three types of peoples, pussies, dicks, assholes. Pussies think everyone can get along and all of that bullshit. Dicks just want to go fuck around. Assholes want to shit on everything. Pussies hate dicks because… well, we're dicks, we fuck pussies. But we also fuck assholes. Why? Because if we didn't, assholes will go around shitting on everybody. That's why the world needs dicks, to fuck all the pussies and rip apart assholes."

Natsu simply nodded.

"Natsu, I am going to train you to be the next generation of dick. You will be bigger, stronger, faster, and all around kick-ass." Gildarts put an arm around Natsu and pulled him into a hug, "When I finish with you, you will be epic (wait for it) dary!" cheered Gildarts as explosions of pure epicness erupted in the background.

"Uh, Gildarts." said Elfman, "Epicdary is not a word."

"I'm Gildarts Clive, I can do whatever I want! The laws of society does not apply to me, I am too kick-ass, awesome, and epic!"

"Wow!" said Natsu, stars in his eyes, "And if I become your apprentice, I can be as epic as you!"

"Natsu, as my apprentice, you can do whatever you want!"

"Really?"

"Really!"

"Okay!" Natsu then looked at Laxus, "Laxus, I want your headphones!"

"What! No way, you can't have my headphones!"

Natsu pouted, "Gildarts! Laxus won't give me his headphones!"

"Laxus! You give Natsu your headphones or I am gonna hatchet you!"

Laxus frowned, "But-"

Gildarts narrowed his eyes as he pulled a hatchet from behind his back.

"Here you go!" said Laxus, as he gave Natsu his head phones and ran off.

"Cool!" said Natsu.

"Yep!" said Gildarts as he put his hatchet back to god knows where. "Now, Natsu there is one last thing that has to be done before we can go."

"What's that?"

"Mirajane!" called Gildarts, beckoning the girl to him, "I'll give you 100 jewels if you take off Natsu's pants!"

Not needing to be told twice, since it was easy money and a chance to get Natsu to blush, Mirajane quickly tore Natsu's pants off of him.

"WOW!" said Mirajane, actually surprised that the little dragon slayer wasn't all that little.

"That's all I needed." concluded Gildarts, as he took Natsu's pants back from the awestruck Mirajane and giving them back to Natsu, "You will be the best apprentice ever!"

"_and Minato and Shanks can suck it_."

* * *

Later on:

Everyone in Fairy Tail was gathered around to see Natsu, Happy, and Gildarts off. Gildarts decided that they would carry light, and find most of the things they may need on their travels.

After being fretted over by Erza, and surprisingly Mirajane, the trio was prepared to leave.

"Do you have a toothbrush?" asked Erza.

"Yes, Erza."

"Toothpaste."

"Yes, Erza,"

"Clean underwear?"

"Erza" cried Natsu, blushing as the guys of Fairy Tail laughed.

Erza sighed, "Well, I guess you have everything you need." She then looked at Gildarts, "So you are only going to be gone for a few months?"

Gildarts nodded, satisfying Erza's question. Erza frowned before pulling Natsu into a hug, "I'm going to miss you Natsu."

Natsu smiled sadly as he hugged Erza tighter, "I am going to miss you, too."

Erza smiled as she released Natsu, holding him at arm length. The two stood there, reveling in the moment.

Until a silver-haired blur pushed Erza aside.

Natsu was confused, first he was holding on Erza, now he was making out with Mirajane.

"Mira! You white-haired bitch!" roared Erza as she rose from the ground.

Mirajane grinned as she let go of Natsu, allowing him to breathe. "I have to make sure I leave my mark on Natsu! I mean imagine it, Gildarts is the hot, mature, guy and if Natsu trains with him, gaining Gildarts' physique, but still keeping his attitude, he will be irresistible."

"Nee-chan!" cried Lisanna as she walked over to move Mirajane aside and give Natsu a hug, "I already told you that Natsu is my future husband!"

"Well yeah, but your young! He may decide that he wants to skip the little sister and have some fun with the big sister." teased Mirajane, winking at a blushing Natsu.

While Lisanna and Erza began to argue with Mirajane, Gildarts put a hand on Natsu shoulder, "You ready to go?"

Natsu grinned, "You betcha!"

Gildarts smiled back, "This is going to be awesome Natsu! You're going to be the best apprentice ever!" Gildarts then dropped down to one knee and placed a hand on Natsu's shoulder, "As a matter of fact… Natsu, you'll be the child I never had, and I promise to look out for you and impart all the awesome and kick ass knowledge inside my brain into yours."

Natsu grinned before he reached out and pulled Gildarts into a hug, getting an 'AW' from the crowd due to the father-son Kodak moment.

Now this scene would be heartwarming to many who saw it, but for one young girl it was the straw that broke the camel's back.

For that young girl, instead of being inspired by Natsu courage in fighting Gildarts and facing his fears, it only angered her. That he managed to get the respect and care from the one man that meant the most to her in a day, while she had been trying for the past year!

No, she wouldn't stand for this. If Natsu gained Gildarts respect enough to train him... then she would train herself so that she could beat... No she would destroy Natsu and gain her father's love.

This was the thoughts of a young Cana Alberano as she glared hatefully at Natsu.

"_Yes_," thought Cana, "_Not only will I become an S-class mage, but I will be the one who will destroy Natsu for taking the love of my father_." "Bwahahahaha!"

Unfortunately, Cana did not realize she was maniacally cackling out loud. Paying no heed to the looks she was given, she bolted out the backdoor to plot her nefarious deeds.

Gray felt the urge to say something about the craziness that surrounds him before deciding against.

"_Nothing years of therapy when I'm older can't solve_." though Gray, nodding safely while taking his clothes off.

Gildarts, deciding enough with farewells, gave everyone a wave, "Okay everyone were off. Feel free to give us a warm farewell as we leave. And by warm farewell, I don't mean the sexual position that I am the creator of, where you take you dick and... Never mind the only people long enough to do it is me and Natsu. Anyway, we're off!

Erza, Mirajane, and Lisanna waved at the departing trio until they could no longer see them. As Erza put her hand down, she took the time to remind herself that they would only be gone for a few months, then Natsu would return and they could be together again.

"_But, not like boyfriend/girlfriend! Just really good friends who enjoy each other company! I don't have those kinds of feelings for Natsu"_ thought a blushing Erza.

Yeah, denial is not just a river in Egypt.

Trying to get her mind off thoughts of romance, Erza took a chance to see if Mirajane or Lisanna had gone back inside the guild.

The sisters still remained outside, Lisanna with a sad look on her face, while Mirajane had a mischievous look.

And Mirajane with a mischievous look on her face was never a good thing.

"What are you thinking about, Mirajane?" growled Erza.

Mirajane grinned, "I was just thinking that when Natsu gets back… I might have to give him some."

Lisanna scratched her head in confusion, "What does give him some mean?"

"YOU WILL BE DOING NO SUCH THING, YOU GODDAMN HARPY!" screamed Erza.

"WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TO STOP ME, YOU GINGER HAIRED FREAK!" screamed Mirajane.

"NO ONE DISREPECTS RED HEADED PEOPLE, YOU RACIST BITCH!" roared Erza as she tackled Mirajane and the two began to wrestle across the ground, completely ignoring a confused Lisanna.

* * *

With Cana:

As Cana sat by the river going through her cards, trying to find a way to make herself stronger, she didn't notice a person standing behind her.

"Oh, do you like cards too?"

Cana shrieked, jumping with a start, causing her cards to scatter.

"Oh, no. I'm sorry!" said the voice, before its owner helped her pick up her cards. The owner was a girl, who was obviously a teenage, with short brown hair, wearing a green dress, with an orange bag slung over her shoulder.

After helping Cana pick up her cards, the girl introduced herself, "Hi! My name is Sakura Kinomoto. What's yours?"

"My name is Cana Alberano. And yeah, I was training to find a way to get better at using my cards."

Sakura nodded, "Wow, that's cool! Hey, I use card magic, maybe I can help you train!"

Cana face brightened, "Really? You would help me?"

Sakura nodded, "Sure, now how about we spar so I can see how good you are?"

From that moment on, Cana found a strong new mentor that specialized in Card Magic, helping her train to become one of the best card mages in Fiore.

* * *

Elsewhere:

Kiba grinned as his friend rolled the ball to him; his leg cocked back and prepared to send the red ball flying. Once the ball got within range, he took a step forward, before kicking the ball with all of his might, sending it sailing through the air.

Giving a whoop, Kiba started making his way to first base; sure that he had scored a homerun.

"Hey! Who's the new kid?" called one of Kiba's buddies.

Slowing down, Kiba looked out toward the outfield to see a pink-haired boy with the kickball in his hands.

Angered that someone messed with his homerun, Kiba stomped out to meet the boy and growled, "Hey, who do you think you are? This is our field!"

The pink haired boy said nothing as he spun the ball between his fingers, eyes downcast. As Kiba friends gathered around the pink haired boy and Kiba, Kiba felt bold enough to challenge the newcomer.

"Hey, I am talking to you dumbass! Who the hell do you think you are?"

The pink haired boy calmly held the ball between his hand, before his hands erupted in fire, burning the ball and scaring the kids.

Kiba gasped as the flames danced across the boy's hand, the boy slowly lifting his head to stare into Kiba's eye.

Kiba could have sworn he saw hell itself in the black eyes of the boys and the flames grew.

The boy finally opened his mouth and said,

"My name is Natsu Dragneel. You have disrespected my sensei. Prepare to die."

Kiba didn't even have a chance to scream as Natsu attacked.

* * *

In the bushes a few feet from the scene:

"HAHAAHAHAHAHA!" laughed Gildarts as he watched his student beat Kiba and his friends into paste with Wakaba and Macao, "He really is the best student ever! He said the line perfectly!"

Macao rubbed his forehead in frustration, "Gildarts, you don't feel any shame on having a child with magical powers beat up a regular kid that insulted you?"

"Nope!" chuckled Gildarts as he pulled out a bag of popcorn to watch the fight, "Ooh, that kid is going to feel that tomorrow!"

"Hey, can we hurry this up?" asked Wakaba, as he looked around nervously, "I am not allowed to be within 15 miles of schools."

"… I really don't want to know, I really, really, don't" said Macao, already feeling a headache brewing, "Gildarts, can we go now?"

"What! Why?" whined Gildarts, "It just getting to the good part!" Gildarts was interrupted by two painful screams, "WOW! Natsu, broke one of those kids legs white breaking another's arm! That kid is epic (wait for it) dary!"

"Fine. Well I am heading back, you coming Wakaba?"

"Yeah, sure man. But let me ask, those girls over there, do you think they are midgets or schoolchildren?"

"You mean those girls wearing school uniforms, with other kids, and lining up in front of a lady who is clearly their teacher?"

"…Maybe they're kinky like that?"

"I have got to get new friends." sighed Macao.

"Look, Natsu dropped kick that kid in the face! IN THE FACE!" cheered Gildarts.

"…Definitely, have to get new friends."

* * *

After Natsu whooped on Kiba and his friends, Gildarts officially started their journey.

After two years of wandering, kicking ass, and taking names; they eventually ended up in a castle.

* * *

An eight year old Natsu with happy sitting on his head followed Gildarts into the gaping entrance of the castle, with strangely looked like a skull.

"Okay Natsu," started Gildarts, "You can go explore the castle and all that good stuff. I… I... am going to visit an old friend, if you hear any weird screaming or anything, do not come and try to help."

"But-"

"Do not come and try to help."

"But what if-"

Gildarts sighed and took a knee motioning for Natsu to do the same, "Natsu, here is your next lesson. Never be a cock blocker, only a true asshole would dare be a cock blocker!"

Elsewhere, Laxus sneezed.

"Now, if you come and try and help me, you will be a cock blocker and by definition, an asshole. Do you want to be an asshole?"

Natsu shook his head, "No sure. I am a dick!"

"Good, now run off and do something!"

Natsu grinned before taking off down the dark hall. Gildarts smiled fondly at the boy as he went the opposite direction, making a few turns before he ended up in a bedroom.

On the bed sat a woman in an Egyptian armor, her legs crossed sensually, and smiled when Gildarts entered the room.

"It is good to see you, Gildarts."

Gildarts smiled back, "It is good to see you to, Teela."

"How was your journey?"

"It was good, I have a new apprentice."

Teela was shocked; Gildarts Clive has taken an apprentice.

"Why-"

Gildarts quickly walked over to Teela and put a finger to her lips, "Less talking, more sucking." said Gildarts, as he unzipped his pants.

Hey, Gildarts only have one use for a women's mouth, and talking is not one of them.

* * *

Elsewhere:

Natsu hummed as he walked down the hallway with Happy riding on his shoulder. After a few minutes of traveling, Natsu entered a courtroom.

The courtroom had seen better day, it floors cover with dust and it walls covered in spider webs. It was barren, but in the center of the room rested a sword. The sword was a simple broadsword, but Natsu couldn't help but feel drawn to the power that the sword resonated.

As Natsu crossed the courtroom, Happy couldn't help but feel anxious, "Natsu, are you sure we should be in here?"

Natsu waved Happy off, "What the worse that could happen?" as he finally reached the sword and lifted it up.

"Wow!" said Natsu, "This is so amazing! I can feel the power coursing through me! It's like, it's like…"

Natsu then heaved the sword above his head, "BY THE POWER OF GRAYSKULL!" the sword's hilt rotated and twisted as a lightning bolt burst through the roof and struck Natsu.

Happy watched in amazement as Natsu body began to grow, his muscles bulging as his clutches changes from a vest and a pair of pants, to a chest plates and a pair of bands across his chest, a furry loin cloth, and a pair of furry boots.

"I HAVE THE POWER!"

Natsu then pointed the sword at Happy, unleashing a beam of energy into the blue exceed. Happy body began to grow as Natsu had his body becoming longer and bigger, and growing black stripes across his body. His jaw grew outward as his eye narrowed and his wings grew to be longer and fuller. Across his back rested a red harness and a red battle mask to cover Happy's face, but left him enough room to show his new fangs.

Where Happy the exceed once stood, now rested a blue, flying, battle-armored tiger.

"Wow, Happy! Look at you!" said Natsu.

"Look at me? Look at you!" said Happy, as the two checked out their new bodies.

"This is so cool!" said Natsu, "I am all fired up!" as flames erupted around his body.

Unfortunately, while the Power Sword was very strong, being held in the middle of flames that were as hot as a real dragon's flame, it quickly melted in Natsu's hand, unable to reverse the magic it had infused into Natsu.

"Uh oh." said Natsu as he looked at the melted metal in his hand.

"Look, Natsu!" cried Happy, "I found my penis, and it's huge! I kind of thought it would be black."

* * *

After that fiasco, Gildarts, Natsu, and Happy spent another two years wandering, making one stop on their way to their next training location.

* * *

Natsu hummed as he made his way through the woods, wasting time as Gildarts had to take care of business in town and Happy was taking a nap. He then heard a terrifying roar coming from his left, followed by a scream from a girl.

Not needing to be told twice, Natsu rushed in that general direction, to come to a clearing where a girl with a wooden sword was fighting against a larger than average bear, that walked on two legs, with its arms dragging on the ground.. The bear had knocked the girl down and was preparing to finish her, until Natsu jumped out of the bushes, shouting, "Fire Dragon's Iron Fist!" punching the bear in the chest, knocking it back.

One of the main thing Gildarts taught Natsu in a fight was to always capitalize on an enemy opening, and always strike at its weakest spot.

The bear's arm easily gave him an edge when it came to range against Natsu, but those arms kept it from having a very good up close game. With his strategy worked out, Natsu charged forward, throwing another punch, only for the bear to move at speeds faster than Natsu could have imagine.

The bear swung it paw forward hitting Natsu in the side, sending him flying into a tree. Natsu shouted out as he slammed into the tree before sliding down and hitting the ground. The bear planning on capitalizing on Natsu's vulnerability, prepared to attack but roared in agony as the girl from earlier used the broken end of her sword and hopped on the bear's shoulder, before stabbing it in the eye, blinding it.

The bear roared is it shook the girl from its shoulder, knocking her to the ground. The bear raised it claw to end the girl, turning its back to Natsu. Which proved to be a deadly mistake.

"Fire Dragon's Roar."

The bear barely had time to react as its body was consumed by the flames, the little girl rolling to the side to avoid the attack. As the flame died down, the bear's charred body fell to the ground dead.

Natsu panted, his attack taking more energy out of him than he expected. As the girl walked over to him, he asked, "Are you okay?"

The girl smiled, "I could ask you the same thing."

"My name is Natsu."

"My name is Kagura."

"Well Kagura, apparently I have food," said Natsu as he pointed to the bear, "Would you like to have lunch with me?"

Kagura smiled, she hadn't had a chance to hang around anyone since her brother died, especially anyone her age. "Sure, I would like that very much, Natsu."

* * *

30 Minutes later:

As Kagura and Natsu ate, Gildarts eventually returned and joined the kids for lunch.

"So, Kagura." asked Natsu, "What exactly are you doing here?"

"I am training so I can join Mermaid Tail."

"Oh, is that a guild?"

Kagura nodded, "It is a guild I want to join, and I have been training in the woods so that I could be strong enough to enter."

"But, shouldn't they accept you and then help you get stronger?" asked Natsu.

Kagura shrugged, "I am not sure, I am afraid that they might reject me."

"But you could spend years out here training by yourself and get hurt, when you can join them and work with other to get stronger."

"I don't know."

"How about I walk in there with you, to support you in asking for admission."

Kagura eyes widened, "You would do that for me?"

"Of course, I will always help my friends."

Kagura blushed at that, "Thank you, Natsu."

"No problem! Now let's go!" he said as he grabbed Kagura hand and had Gildarts leads them to the guild.

* * *

30 minutes later:

"I can't believe it. I am apart of Mermaid Tail." cheered Kagura as she pointed to the Mermaid Tail symbol on her left shoulder.

"I know." said Natsu, "Congratulations."

Kagura smiled as she pulled Natsu into a hug, "Thank you, Natsu!"

Natsu smiled as he hugged his friend.

"Natsu!" called Gildarts as he walked up behind the two, "I have all of the supplies, it's time for us to go."

"You have to leave?" asked Kagura, sad that she would be losing her friend so soon.

Natsu nodded, "Me and Gildarts are on a really awesome training adventure, so we have to keep moving, but I know that we will see each other again soon."

Kagura smiled, "You promise?"

Natsu grinned, "I promise."

As Natsu, Gildarts, and Happy continued on their journey, Kagura smiled as she waved at the trio, already anticipating when she and Natsu would meet again.

* * *

Later on that year:

* * *

Natsu watched in confusion as he watched the fighters battle against each other on a floating field, with two floating platforms, and a weird, half red, half white ball painted on the center of the field.

Natsu watched the scoreboard as it updated the scores of each participant, showing a man with blue overalls, a red shirt, a red hat with an 'M', and a large moustache currently in last place. In third, was a two legged fox hybrid. In second, was a large gorilla with a tie with the initials 'DK', and the first was a man wearing a blue jumpsuit, with yellow boots, yellow gloves, large, silver, shoulder pads, and a red helmet with a golden falcon engraved in the middle, and a black visor to hide the man's identity.

"Gildarts, what are we doing here?"

"Well, Natsu. I wasn't planning on bringing you here for a few years, but since you used the Power Sword which increase your physique and durability to the level needed, I decided to bring you here so you can learn your next move."

Natsu nodded, idly flexing his bicep. After the power sword was destroyed, he was unable to return to his smaller self, so he ended up staying with his warrior body. Gildarts taught him that the Power Sword allowed it wielder to transform into the champion of Gray skull by wielding its power, but since Natsu destroyed the sword, he now had to work extra hard to keep his physique in order not to lose the muscles. Now, Natsu could pass for a fifteen year old who worked out and kept himself in great shape.

Happy on the other hand was extremely happy with his new transformation. Natsu took the chance to peek at the sky, catching a glimpse of the blue tiger as it soared over the stadium. Apparently, exceeds had a magic that allowed certain exceeds to change into small, cute, forms or battle-ready forms. This meant Happy did not have to worry too much about losing his physique since he could change at a moment's whim. Gildarts did inform him that he should at least try to learn how to fight in his tiger form to help Natsu in fights, which Happy took seriously and had been training with his new fangs and claws.

Natsu return his attention to the battle to catch the blue suited man knocking the fox and the overall wearing man with a single kick before turning to face the gorilla.

The gorilla banged on his chest before charging the man, throwing a punch. The man easily rolled under the punch to avoid the hit, before standing and grabbing the gorilla and hurling it over his shoulder.

Before the Gorilla could recover, the man leaped in the air and yelled, "Falcon kick!" before flames surrounded his body and he delivered a flame kick to the Gorilla knocking it in the air. The man quickly followed the Gorilla, grabbing it in mid-air before igniting his body in fire, launching the gorilla once more. The Gorilla roared in pain as it flipped helplessly through the air.

The man quickly took off to the Gorilla intended landing point, and cocked his right fist back and began to charge it.

"Falcon" called the man as flames began to surround his fist, just as the gorilla fell in his line of sight.

"PUNCH!" roared the man as he throw a right punch, coated in flames that now resembled a falcon, collided with the Gorilla and creating an explosion that rock the stadium and sent the Gorilla flying into the horizon.

"The winner of the match… CAPTAIN FALCON!" called the scoreboard as the crowd went wild.

Captain Falcon smiled as he flipped through the air, delivering two kicks before landing in a crouch with his left leg forward and his arms stretch back.

"Show your moves!" said the manliest man in all fighting games, sending the crowd into another round of applause for their champion.

Natsu watched on in amazement, still recalling the man fighting prowess and power from the match.

"Gildarts, is that man a dragon-slayer?"

Gildarts shook his head, "No, that man is a captain… a captain of fucking awesome! Now, come on, let introduce you to your new teacher."

Natsu didn't need to be told otherwise as he followed Gildarts.

* * *

After spending a two years training with Captain Falcon and participating in the Super Smash Brothers tournament, Natsu was definitely on his way to become the badass that was Gildarts. He still had a few more years to go, but he was definitely making progress.

The twelve year old Natsu smiled as he tended to the campfire, Gildarts has decided to go take a walk, and Happy was currently napping by a tree.

This gave Natsu some value alone time to think over a few things. When he was younger, he would have hated this kind of time, but Gildarts taught him that by taking time to think, he could find new ways to use his magic, and that actually thinking would be the only way he could handle some of the magic and training he will receive in the future.

So, he took the time to remember his time at the Super Smash Bros. tournament. He made a lot of friends there, most surprisingly, the Koopa King, Browser. He guessed it had to do with the fact that they both could breathe fire out of their mouths. Who knows?

The only thing that threw him off was the looks that he kept getting from that Samus. Natsu shuddered, he wasn't sure but he was sure that his suit could see through clothes. He made sure to keep distance between the two of them. Having dudes check him out was not something he cared for.

"ELFMAN, STOP!"

Natsu's ears perked up at that.

"_That sounds like Lisanna! She sounds like she needs help!"_ thought Natsu.

"Natsu, let's go!" called Happy, who was already up and transformed in his tiger form.

Natsu nodded as he hopped on Happy's back and they took off.

* * *

With Mirajane:

This wasn't supposed to happen.

This mission should have ended when they finally took down the Beast. What she didn't suspect was that Elfman feeling of inferiority with being unable to complete master his take-over magic would lead him to try and take-over the Beast.

For a few seconds, it was okay.

Elfman had control, he was able to successful use his take-over magic.

Then, he lost control. The Beast was too strong. Now, she and Lisanna were facing a full-powered Beast while she barely had enough power to stand.

Mirajane built up her courage, hoping to use the last bit of her magic in her Satan Soul form to hopefully wound the monster, enough so that Lisanna could get away.

Unfortunately, the Beast already knew what she was thinking, rushing forward and punching her in the stomach, knocking the wind out of her. She didn't even have time to register what happened as the monster raised his fist above his head and brought it down across Mirajane's skull, hard enough to face plant her into the ground.

The Beast didn't stop there, as it raised its other hand and began to pound Mirajane into the dirt, not stopping until it was sure she was dead.

Mirajane screamed in agony as she was knocked out of her Satan Soul form, meaning she no longer had any real protection to take the blows.

As she felt her body begin to break, she only hoped that Lisanna used the distraction to escape.

"ELFMAN, STOP!"

"_No."_ thought Mirajane in horror as her sister stood between her and the beast.

"Elfman, please! You have to stop this! We're your family!"

Mirajane struggled to stand to her feet, desperately willing her body to protect Lisanna.

"_Wait, what it is doing?"_ thought Mirajane as the Beast took a step back, clutching its head.

For a second, Mirajane thought Lisanna reached her brother inside the Beast.

Her eyes widen in horror, however, as the Beast narrowed it eyes and reared its fist back.

"LISANNA, NO!" screamed Mirajane, watching as the Beast's fist approached her sister.

Only for it to stop.

"What-"murmured Mirajane, when she finally noticed what stop the Beast.

In between the Beast and Lisanna stood a teenager. He was muscular, wearing a pair of white gi pants, black sandals, and an open vest. Yet, what caught Mirajane attention the most was the dragon-scale pattern scarf and the spikey pink hair.

"Wait, dragon scarf and pink hair… it couldn't be."

"NATSU!" screeched Mirajane.

Natsu grinned, "Hi Mirajane. Hi Lisanna."

"Natsu." stuttered Lisanna, surprised by the appearance of her 'husband'.

Her husband who was calmly blocking the Beast's fist with one hand while facing them.

"I would love to talk, but let me deal with this first!" said Natsu, before he narrowed his eyes, and with his free arm, elbowed, the beast in the stomach, causing the monster to cough and stumble back. Natsu took two steps back, before leaping in the air and spinning. Once he gained enough momentum, he lashed out with a kick, sending the Beast flying down the area.

"Okay, now that, that's been taken care of, how are you two doing?"

Mirajane and Lisanna were at a loss for words. Standing in front of them was Natsu, Fairy Tail's most destructive mage and knucklehead, who managed to not only block a punch from the Beast without flinching and sending it flying with a kick.

Before either one could say anything, Lisanna screamed as a blue blur slammed into to her.

Mirajane watched in horror as a blue tiger now rested on Lisanna stomach, and from her point of view, appeared to be eating her face.

Instead of screams of pain, Lisanna laughed.

"What-"asked Mirajane, completely confused.

"Lisanna, I missed you so much!" said Happy as he happily licked at Lisanna face, causing her to squeal in delight.

"What, that's Happy?!" screeched Mirajane, to which Natsu grinned and nodded.

Before Mirajane could ask any more questions, the Beast roared as it finally stood up, before glaring hatefully at Natsu.

Shaking the dirt off its shoulder, the monster roared once more and charged Natsu, preparing to rip the boy limb from limb.

"Hey, Mirajane. Let me deal with this and then we'll talk." said Natsu as he covered his fist in flames, preparing to end the fight.

"Natsu, wait! That's not just the Beast, it is also Elfman!" cried Mirajane, hoping to stop Natsu from killing her brother.

"Really?" Mirajane nodded, "Well, that changes things." said Natsu as he canceled his flames.

Instead, he stood still as he made eye contact with the Beast, unwavering as the monster got closer.

Mirajane began to freak out, ready to push Natsu out of the way to keep him from being killed, before Natsu spoke.

"_**ENOUGH"**_ said Natsu, power resonating in his voice, flowing out of him passing over Lisanna, Mirajane, and Happy; and focusing on the Beast.

As the command reached, the Beast the monster stumbled mid-charge, before its eyes closed and it fell forward, sliding to a stop in front of Natsu.

"Wow, that _**Haoshoku Haki**_ stuff is really cool." said Natsu, "I am going to have to get Gildarts to give me some more training with it."

"Well, I think Elfman is going to be okay." said Natsu, as he watched as the Beast slowly transformed back into an unconscious Elfman.

Finally gaining her ability to speak, Mirajane grabbed Natsu by his vest, taking note that he was taller than her by a few inches now, and shook him, "Natsu, you idiot, where have you been? You been gone for six years! You and Gildarts only said you would be gone for a few months! Do you know how worried we been?" yelled Mirajane, tears at the corner of her eyes, remembering how the guild thought the worst after they hadn't heard from Natsu after the first year.

Before she could berate him again, Natsu pulled Mirajane into a hug. Blushing, Mirajane didn't know what to say, her head resting on Natsu chest.

"I am really sorry, Mirajane. Gildarts been teaching me a lot of stuff and I guess we lost track of time. But, I hope that I will be home soon, so don't worry okay,"

Not trusting herself to speak, Mirajane simply nodded.

"Hey!" called Lisanna, after she managed to get Happy off of her, "What about me?" as she held her arms out expectantly.

Natsu grinned as he released Mirajane, and pulled Lisanna into a hug, holding her tightly.

As he finished the hug, Natsu looked into the sky to take note of the sun, "Well, I think it is time for me to go. But, don't worry; I'll be back in Fairy Tail in no time!"

With that said, Natsu hopped on Happy's back and with a few beats of Happy's powerful wings, they were airborne.

As the sister watched the two fly away, Mirajane only had one thing to say.

"He is definitely getting some."

"Nee-chan!" screeched Lisanna as she proceeded to chase a laughing Mirajane around the field.

* * *

After rescuing the Strauss Siblings, Gildarts took Natsu and Happy further West, to train Natsu on how to defeat a dragon.

* * *

Natsu and Gildarts stood on the side of a snowy cliff, as they watched as two women currently battle with a white dragon. While both of them were holding their own, the tides began to changes when a second dragon, a dragon with large horns and red skin swooped down and join the battle.

"So, what exactly do you want me to do again?"

"Well, in order for you to learn the language of the dragons, you have to show that you are able to absorb dragon's souls." explained Gildarts, paying less attention to Natsu, but more on how skimpy the armor of the female warriors as the jumped around to dodge dragon fire.

"So, I need to go down there and kill a dragon."

"Basically. Oh, wait, there is a Dragon Priest. Yeah, they are definitely going to need help."

Natsu shrugged, as his Dragon Slayer magic activated coating his fist in fire, "You ready, Happy?"

"Ready, Natsu!" as the two leapt off the cliff side and joined the fight.

* * *

With the two women:

Miltilda Silverfang, Dragonborn and Leader of the Companions, was pretty sure she had bitten off more than she can chew, which is pretty funny coming from a werewolf.

The mission was supposed to be easy; she had received a note about a mysterious power in Lost Tongue Overhook. Simple mission, go out kill a Dragon and gain its soul, so she decided to take Aela as back up, figuring what could go wrong.

It went to shit faster than the companion party where Mjoll had a little bit too much to drink.

For a woman who was so noble, she sure did know her way around a stripper pole.

Anyway…

Now she and Aela were facing off against two dragons and a dragon priest. She was dangerously low on magic and her weapons already lost their enchantment. Now sure how they were going to get out of this situation, Miltilda silently prayed to any Daedric or Nord God that wasn't an asshole to come save them.

"Fire Dragon's Roar"

Miltilda wasn't sure who answered her prayer, but she made note that when she faced a Daedric God, she might listen to them before she guts them like a trout.

Keyword, might.

Miltilda and Aela covered their faces as the stream of fire consumed the frost dragon, killing it instantly. As the source of the attack landed with a blue, flying, tiger; they couldn't help but be impressed.

And only part of it was due to the fact that he was heavily muscular while only wearing a vest.

It was nice to see guys actually run around in skimpy clothes for once.

Miltilda was once again interrupted from her thoughts as the ancient dragon roared in anger at the death of the frost dragon, before letting loose a torrent of flames at the boy, instantly consuming him.

Fearing the worse, Militida and Aela were surprised to hear … munching coming from inside the fire.

The dragon's fire began to shrink as the boy inside of it began to consume the fire, letting out a loud burp when he finished.

The boy grinned before he motioned for his tiger, which quickly charged the dragon, and leapt at its neck. The dragon screamed as the tiger tore into its neck, ripping open a large gash, leaving the dragon to bleed to death.

With two dragons down, the boy turned his gaze towards the dragon priest. The priest spoke in a forgotten language before he aimed his staff at the boy and hurled balls of ice at him.

The boy jumped to the side to avoid one, and use his flame covered fist to smash another. He then charged at the priest, knocking aside more ice attacks before he got close enough, planting one foot and cocking a fist back.

The flames on his fist shined brightly as he roared, "Fire Dragon's Iron Fist!" before he throw a punch, colliding with the Priest's face, breaking its mask and causing it head to do a complete 180. The priest let out a guttural moan before dropping to the ground dead.

The boy grinned, "Wow that was fun. My training is really paying off!" he then turned to his tiger, "Happy! You managed to even kill a dragon!"

Happy looked up from cleaning his fear, "Ay!"

The boy then turned to Miltilda and Aela, "Oh, let me introduce myself. I am Natsu Dragneel."

Miltilda smiled, removing her dragon bone helmet, letting down her long red hair.

"I am Miltilda Silverfang, Dragonborn of Skyrim and leader of the Companions, this is my fr-"

Said 'friend' quickly knocked Miltilda aside and grabbed Natsu hands, "Hi, I am single and horny… I mean, Aela the Huntress, member of the Companion, a single member of the companion, who is also very horny."

You might think Aela was laying it on thick, but look at it her from her perspective.

Many of the men in Skyrim come in a value pack. They are usually stupid, smell bad, scared of her due to her battle prowess, and aren't that impressive when it comes to battle.

Natsu, was strong, took down a dragon and a dragon's priest in one hit, had a kick ass tiger, and smelled divine.

She was only a few seconds away from turning around and bending over for him.

Miltilda growled at her companion's actions, her inner werewolf begging to beat her companion into the dirt and take the boy for herself.

Before she could speak, she noticed the dragon corpses began to glow, realizing that their souls were about to be released.

As the dragons glowed, Miltilda was surprised as she absorbs one of the souls, and Natsu absorbs the other.

Natsu watched in confusion as his body glowed, shining as the dragon's soul coursed through his body. Looking at Miltilda and Aela expression, Natsu shrugged, "I guess I am a Dragonborn. Do you guys think you can help me train in this kind of stuff?"

Miltilda smiled, if Natsu joined her, she would gain a powerful, new, ally who even had an awesome tiger as she journey across the land. Grinning, "Natsu, welcome to the team."

Aela smiled as she walked up to Natsu, leaning against him as she trailed a finger along his chest, "Perfect. Now that you are a part of our group, we need to test your hand to hand prowess, preferably, naked, and in a bedroom."

Natsu blushed, "_I wonder if those two did something like that before I got here._" and his mind began to create the image inside his head, causing little Natsu to come to attention.

"Oh!" grinned Aela, forsaking her wolf background and grinning like the Cheshire cat, "It looks like someone has a bone for me to hide!"

* * *

Meanwhile back with Gildarts:

At the Shrine of Azura, Gildarts smiled as he stood in front of the statue. Focusing his magic into a ball between his hands, he pressed it into the chest of the statue and waited.

After a few minutes, the statue began to shine as magic courses through it, escaping through cracks and filling the room with light. Gildarts covered his eyes as the statue, exploded flooding the room with light.

In its place stood the living, breathing, see through robe wearing, Azura daedric princess of dusk and dawn.

"Who have called upon my- Wait a second, Gildarts Clive? You dare call upon me!" roared the princess as she hopped off her pedestal to erase Gildarts from existence.

"Hi, Zu-zu, you still look great as ever!"

"Don't Zu-zu me! How dare you bring your no good, manwhore, self here."

Gildarts smiled sheepishly, "I think you might be overreacting."

"Overreacting! You slept with all of my sisters!"

"Oh, you remember that?"

"Of course I remember that, you son-of-a-bitch! You got all of them pregnant!"

"But, Zu-zu, I didn't summon them; I summoned you because I missed you!"

"…Really?"

"Really." said Gildarts as he pulled Azura into his arms, "Now how about I show you how much I love you."

"Oh, Gildarts!" giggled the princess as Gildarts kissed her; happy to be with the man she loved.

Until she found him in bed with Merida and Vaermina a week later.

* * *

After three years of touring Skyrim with Miltilda and Aela, Natsu and Happy reunited with Gildarts to continue their travels.

* * *

Natsu sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair, which had grown longer over the years, his bangs growing longer, now covering his right eye. The rest of his hair surprising didn't grow down his shoulders, but stayed the same length, just growing much spikier than usual.

He now sported light stubble on his face, similar to Gildarts.

Speaking of Gildarts, Natsu body finally caught up with his power sword growth, and instead of being short and insanely muscular, he now stood an inch shorter than Gildarts, allowing his muscles to stretch and fill out his body better. Now, apparently from how some of his female companion saw him, he had the physique of a pink haired Greek god.

Natsu wardrobe has changed since he started his travel, now starting to mirror Gildarts. He now wore a red cape around his shoulder, with a high collar to protect his neck, with belts to keep it closed across his torso. He still wore the same gi pants, but he now had red flames along the bottom of the legs with his trademark sandals.

Natsu frowned as he looked around the city they were strolling through, it was definitely more high tech than any of the other cities they been too and a lot cleaner.

"Gildarts, where are we?"

"I'm not sure. We're just passing through to meet up with an old friend of mine."

Natsu nodded, still not paying attention to his surroundings, until

WHAM!

Natsu stopped when he walked into someone, knocking the person down.

"Oh, my bad!" said Natsu as he help the woman up.

The woman in question wore a pair of black sneakers, a black skirt, a white shirt, and a pair of black suspenders, a pair of red battle glove and long black hair.

Natsu blushed as he noticed the woman's womanly 'asset' that strained her tight, white, shirt.

"_God, I am becoming a pervert like Gildarts!"_ thought Natsu.

"I'm sorry!" said the woman, as she dusted herself off, "I wasn't looking where I was going." After finally cleaning herself off, she look up to thank Natsu for the hand up, and froze.

"So, handsome!"

Natsu blushed as Gildarts and Happy grinned at his embarrassment.

The girl realizing what she said out loud blushed and shook her head. After gaining her composure, she held out her hand, "Hi there, I am TIfa Lockhart."

Natsu smiled and shook her hand, "Hi, I'm Natsu Dragneel and this is my mentor Gildarts and my exceed, Happy."

"Wow, it is really nice to meet you Natsu. I know this is sudden, but could you help me with something?"

"Like what?"

"Well, I need help with my club because one of my guys dropped out at the last minute and I really need someone to feel his spot."

Natsu thought about it, "_Maybe she needs me as a bouncer or something." _ "Sure! Why not!"

Tifa grinned as she hopped up and down, doing wondrous things to her body, "Perfect! Follow me then!"

* * *

Later on that night:

A pink hair woman wearing a white t-shirt, a brown skirt, and brown boots covered her face in embarrassment as her brunette fried, wearing a blue toga like shirt, a blue sarong, and a pair sandals, dragged her inside the club.

"Fang!" she hissed, "How could you bring me to someplace like this!?"

Fang grinned, "Come on Lightning, you need to have some fun! Besides, the only thing you been doing since we rescued Serah is sit around and mope since she and Snow hooked back up!"

Lightning blushed at the sound of that man's name, "I have no idea what you're talking about!"

Fang scoffed as she and Lightning sat down at a table, "Yeah right, everyone on the team except Hope could see that you two had a thing for each other, and before you try to deny it, remember who caught who trying to peek on Snow while he was washing in a lake."

Lightning blushed, "You only caught me because you were spying on him too."

"Hey, as a woman, it is within my rights to spy on handsome guys like Snow, Mr.33 centimeters indeed!" barked Fang as she ordered a drink.

Lightning groaned as the blush on her face grew, she needed to change the subject, "I still don't know why you brought me to a strip club!"

"Hey, just because you lost out on Snow doesn't mean you have to be single! Who knows there might be a hot, straight, guy up there that you might want to take home!"

"Wait, guys?"

"Yeah, guys. What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing, I kinda figured…"

"Figured what? That the tough, brunette, doesn't like the company of men? That she swings for the other team? That just because she can kick ass and take name, she's a carpet muncher? That just because she hangs out with a super feminine friend means she's a lesbian?"

"… Well, yeah."

Fang rolled her eyes, "Well, that doesn't mean that I can't enjoy a good looking man, like Snow, or any other that catches my eye."

Lightning nodded, feeling ashamed for making such judgment about her friend.

"It just main that I'm bisexual"

Before Lightning could respond, the crowd quieted down as the owner of the club walked out.

"Hi everybody!" said Tifa Lockhart, "I want to welcome everyone to _Naughty Heaven_! You all want to see some hot guys take it off?"

"Hell, yeah!" screamed Fang, scaring Lightning as many of the other woman in the crowd shared Fang's sentiment, "Bring out the hot, man meat."

Tifa grinned, "Well first up, please welcome the One Winged Angel!" said Tifa as she hopped off the stage, to let Sephiroth strut out.

* * *

Thirty minutes later:

Fang was satisfyingly drunk as she catcalled at Cloud who was finishing his act, "This is great, right Lightning?"

Lightning shrugged, a bit lightheaded from all the alcohol she consumed, "It's okay, but none of the guys could compete with Snow."

Fang nodded, "True, none of these guys have any muscles. They kind of remind of Hope, you remember how he used to crush on you?"

Lightning groaned, while she had nothing against the boy, he became really clingy after awhile.

Fang grinned at this, "Man, while he was a nice kid, he was more feminine then Vanille. I'm pretty sure that if he wasn't traveling with us, he would probably be spending a lot of his time on his knees."

* * *

Elsewhere:

Hope grinned as he prepared himself for a night on the town. As he prepared to leave his home, he quickly ran back inside and grabbed a pack of condoms.

"I can't leave these." he said, "God willing, I'll be able to slip them on my would-be attackers before I am brutally sodomized."

* * *

Back at Naughty Heaven:

Tifa nodded as she judged the crowd, it was time to bring out her secret weapon.

"You ready, Natsu?"

"Do I have to?" whined the Dragon Slayer from behind a curtain.

"But Natsu, if you don't, my club will fail. And if it fails, then I will have to shut down and sell my body on the streets to pay back the loans. You wouldn't want that to happen to pretty little me, now would you?" asked Tifa.

Natsu shook his head, and seeing that she had on the ropes, Tifa hit Natsu with her limit break attack.

The Puppy Dog Eyes.

* * *

Ten Minutes later:

"Please welcome to the stage, The Barbarian Dragon Slayer!" called Tifa, as she pushed Natsu on the stage.

Natsu blushed as he walked onto the stage, wearing his He-man outfit, which in all honesty, a stripper's outfit.

Natsu sighed as he observed all of the women in the crowd, before taking a deep breath to steel his nerves, and began to perform.

"My word! Look at that hunk of man!" cheered Fang, as Natsu began to flex his muscles and move his hips on the stage, "He's gorgeous!"

Lightning blushed; agreeing with Fang's opinion as Natsu worked his loin cloth off, leaving himself in a red speedo, to the wild cheers of the women.

"Yeah, baby! Shake it!" hollered Fang, before reaching into her top and pulling out a few dollars, "Come over here! Mama got a treat for you!"

"Fang!" hissed Lightning but it was too late, as Natsu made his way to Fang's table.

"How you ladies doing?" asked Natsu, still flexing and performing.

"I'm doing great hot stuff! But my friend here is pretty depressed; I think should could use a lap dance!"

"Fang!" hissed Lightning, her face blood red as Natsu turned her chair outward and began to grind against Lightning.

"My god, those abs!" though Lightning as her eyes hungrily rolled over Natsu's front, from his pectorals, to his abs, and finally….

"_MY GOD!"_ thought Lightning, apparently, Natsu didn't mind pressing himself up against a hot women.

Before she even knew it, blood erupted from Lightning nose as her mind was overloaded with perverted thoughts, passing out in her chair.

Before Natsu could do anything, Fang pulled him over to her, and slipped a few dollars in his speedo, "Okay, handsome my turn!"

"Wait about your friend?"

"Dance I say!"

Natsu sighed as he danced for Fang, only for her to reach out and smack him on the stomach.

"Look at me like you're a virgin!" ordered Fang, blood slowly leaking from her nose.

"I am a virgin!"

"Not when I finish with you!" Fang then reached into her top and pulled out a wad of cash, "Tifa! Bag him and tag him, this boytoy is coming home with me!"

Tifa blinked, "I am sorry, but-"

"Shut up and take my money!" yelled Fang as she threw her money at Tifa, who caught it.

"_This is nearly ten thousand dollars!"_ thought Tifa gleefully, "Sold!"

"You can't sell me!" yelled Natsu.

"Wait, we can buy him?" asked Fran, the lovely, chocolate Veira.

"No fair, I want him!" yelled Penelope.

"I'm sorry girls, but he's coming home with me!" said Aerith.

"I don't think so!" yelled Lulu,

"Over my dead body, you whore!" said Fang, as she grabbed Natsu and Lightning and took off, the hordes of women following her.

* * *

An Hour Later:

Lightning groaned as she woke up, "What happened?" she murmured.

"You passed out."

"Oh, thank you." said Lightning, before realizing she was in a room with Natsu.

"EEK!" shrieked Lightning, "What are you doing here?!" she demanded.

Natsu shrugged, "Your friend locked us in here. She said we can't leave until you can't walk straight, whatever that means."

Lightning blushed before she rushed to the door and tried to open it, realizing it wouldn't budge.

"Fuck!" said Lightning before she turned back to Natsu.

"_Fang really has that door bolted down." _ Lightning then noticed that Natsu still only had his chest bands and speedo on, leaving himself pretty much on display.

Lightning blushed, "Well, everyone always told me to live a little."

Her mind made up, Lightning marched over to Natsu, and before he could react, pulled him down into a kiss.

"_This is pretty nice."_ thought Lightning and Natsu as the kiss deepened and their hands began to roam.

* * *

Outside the room:

Fang sighed, "Jeez, I wonder if those two have done it yet."

BAM!

"AAAH!" screamed Fang, as Lightning head just punched a hole through the wall.

"Yeah!" moaned Lightning, "You know I like it rough!" screamed Lightning as her head disappeared through the wall, follow by more crashing sounds and moaning.

"Wow!" said Fang, before she came up with a devious thought.

Fang slowly walked to the door to the bedroom, slowly opening it to peer inside.

Fang gasped as she watched the pinkettes go at it, both of them naked as Lightning was held up by Natsu as he thrust into to her, her limbs holding onto to him tightly, as he pinned her against the wall.

Fang blushed as she watched the two, "_This is better than any porn I've ever seen._"

Slowly walking into the room, Fang called, "Hey Natsu, Lightning. If you want me to join you guys, don't stop having sex." When they didn't stop, Fang grinned, "Fuck yeah!" as she removed her clothes, turning the twosome into a threesome.

* * *

The next day:

"Wow!" said Natsu, Lightning, and Fang; as they lay in Lightning destroyed bed in the disaster zone that was Lightning bedroom.

"My ass hurts." whined Fang.

Lightning scoffed, "That's what you get for trying to take lil Natsu up the backdoor with no lube."

"You did the same thing!"

"Yeah, but you don't see me whining about it!" jeered Lightning. Her ass may feel as if someone shoved a baseball bat up it (which was a close estimate), she still handle it like a trooper.

Fang pouted, "Whatever, but it was still the best night of my life." she grinned as she pulled Natsu into a kiss, "Thanks, stud!"

Lightning smiled and pulled Natsu into a kiss as well, "Thanks from me too."

Natsu grinned, "No problem. I just can't believe I had my first time with two hot chicks!"

Fang and Lightning blinked, "Wait… you're a virgin!"

Natsu nodded.

"But… the things you did with your tongue." said Fang

"and your hands!" said Lightning.

"And that monster between your legs!" they both exclaimed.

Natsu shrugged, "My sensei Gildarts said that I can't be a dick and not be able to please women. Oh… I forgot!"

Natsu quickly got up and rushed to the window, and opened it, "Hey Gildarts!" yelled Natsu.

"What?" cried Gildarts, from his spot on the corner nailing a bent over woman from behind.

"Gildarts! I just had sex and it felt so good! A woman let me put my penis inside of her. I just had sex and I'll never go back!"

"Never go back to what?" asked Gildarts.

"To the not-having-sex ways of the past!" replied Natsu.

Gildarts smiled as tears came to his eyes, "Natsu, I am so proud!" Gildarts then looked down at the woman he was pounding, "Whore! Quickly, get us some fireworks so I can celebrate my apprentice success."

"My name is Trina!"

"And my name is rip the soul out of your chest if you don't get some fireworks!"

"With what money?" Trina grunted, "You haven't paid me yet!"

Gildarts scoffed, "Gildarts Clive doesn't pay for strange! See, I ever had a cup that says that!" he said, as he pulled a mug from behind his back that said, "Gildarts Clives doesn't pay for strange."

Gildarts Clive… God amongst men.

* * *

After promising to come back and see Lightning and Fang, Natsu, Happy and Gildarts continued to the last destination of Natsu's training, making one more stop in another city.

* * *

Natsu sighed as he walked around the new city, Gildarts deciding they would have one night on the town before Natsu continued his training. After exploring the town, Natsu decided to return to camp when he noticed a commotion across the street.

It was five guys pawing at an obviously drunk woman. Not sure of what was happening but trusting his instincts, Natsu decided to intervene.

* * *

Ten minutes earlier:

Ultear Milkovich was drunk.

How drunk.

Drunk enough that if an elephant consumer the amount of liquor she did it would have died twice.

She was drinking due to the situation of her current love life.

Correction, non-existent love life.

She had no suitable men to date in Grimoire Heart.

Zancrow thought he was a Super Saiyan 3 with rinnegan.

Kane was fat and ugly.

And Hades… she would rather stick with her toys.

So, what the best way to deal with your problems. Drink them away.

This led to her current predicament, being surrounded by five guys in her inebriated state. If she was sober, she could hand those guys their asses in three seconds, but drunk, this could definitely be a problem.

Before any of the guys could try for anything else…

"FALCON KICK!"

One of them caught a flaming foot to the side of the head, knocking him out.

Ultear watched as her hero turned to the others, his cape billowing dramatically, and he simply said, "Show your moves!"

Thinking they had a chance as a group, the four attacked.

The poor, misguided, fools.

Natsu easily parried their punches, lashing out with a kick to one of the men's knees, crippling him before knocking him out with a knee to the face.

He caught the next man's fist, twisting it, causing the man to scream in pain, before delivering a chop to his neck putting him down.

Natsu ducked under the next punch, before retaliating with an uppercut sending the man flying.

Natsu slowly turned to the last man, who was shaking in fear. Natsu narrowed his eyes, before jumping at the man, causing him to scream in fear, and turning around to run.

Only to run straight into a wall head first.

With the men put down, Natsu went to check on Ultear, "Are you okay miss?"

Ultear grinned drunkenly, definitely liking what she was seeing. She definitely wanted to spend the night with this man, and decided on the perfect words to convince him to join her.

"Hey, you and me, baby, ain't nothing but mammals, so let's do it like they do it on The Discovery Channel."

Definitely classy.

Regaining enough of her senses, Ultear led Natsu back to her hotel room, planning on properly rewarding her hero.

Neither knew how many problems this was going to cause when they ran into each other again.

* * *

After that night, Natsu, Gildarts, and Happy continued their journey.

"Okay Natsu, here we are!" said Gildarts as Happy landed on the white tiles of Kami's Lookout.

"This is where you will receive your final training. Over the years, you have grown exponentially in power and this man we will meet and myself will train you to control your powers, so you don't burn or destroy everything when you blink!"

Natsu nodded as he and Gildarts hopped off Happy's back, when he finally noticed a man walking toward them from the mansion a few meters away.

The man had weird, spikey, hair, three spikes in the front and two in the back with the hair on the top of his head lying down flat. He wore a blue gi top and yellow gi pants, and black Chinese shoes. As he got closer, Natsu could tell that this was not an ordinary man; this man could easily wiped the floor with him or Gildarts if they choose to cross him.

Gildarts smiled as the man got closer, "Natsu, I would like for you to meet Son Goku. Goku, I would like for you to meet my student Natsu Dragneel."

Goku smiled and waved at the two, "Hi Gildarts, Natsu! What can I do for you?"

"Well Goku, I need your help in training Natsu."

Goku frowned, "Why do you need my help?"

"Natsu has been growing insanely strong over the years, and I need you to impart some of your knowledge onto him?"

"Hmm," though Goku, "Natsu, tell me a joke."

Natsu blinked in confusion before shrugging, "Okay! Why did the turkey cross the road? Because it was the chicken's day off!" laughed Natsu.

Gildarts groaned at the corniness of the joke, but watched as Goku broke down in a belly shaking laugh, as if Natsu had said the funniest thing on Earth.

"That was really good!" said Goku, "I needed to judge your character before I can train you. You see, I wouldn't have taught someone who only reason for getting stronger was for selfish reason, such as getting stronger to beat others. The fact that you told such a cheesy joke helped me glimpse a bit of your soul, and I can see that you want to become stronger to help others and protect those who can't protects themselves. Natsu, I will help you train!"

"Really!" said Natsu, while Goku simply nodded, "YES!" he cheered before taking off to do a lap around the lookout, with Happy running beside him.

As Natsu took his lap, Goku turned back to Gildarts, "I know that there are being in this universe that can challenge me in a fight on equal grounds that could train Natsu. Why exactly did you bring him to me?"

Gildarts simply said, "When I first fought Natsu all those years ago, he summoned his power. I always know Natsu had a magical talent, but I noticed another power residing in him. Something more primal, similar to a certain ape. It's funny because it actually reminded me of you."

Goku blinked, "You don't think-"

"That maybe he's your son. Maybe, after you achieved Godhood, you did spend a lot of time roaming the lands. You can't say that you didn't find a woman to lay with in all of that time. I know Vegeta eventually received his Godhood after you did, but I doubt Natsu could be Vegeta's child"

Goku nodded, "But that doesn't mean-"

"This is so cool!" yelled Natsu, "I am all FIRED UP!" he shouted, as his power erupted from him in his happiness, sending a torrent of fire magic into the air.

Then, Goku felt it.

The primal power that coursed through his veins. The power that allowed him to push his body to new levels, and brought him back stronger after every near death experience.

Inside of Natsu magical power, he felt it, bubbling underneath. He knew exactly what would happen if Natsu was allowed to wander without being able to control those powers, recalling his own bloodlust when he fought Freiza as a Super Saiyan for the first time. How he lashed out against his son and nearly died because he wanted to fight.

Not wanting to put Natsu through that, Goku nodded.

"Okay, Gildarts, I'll train him."

"Thanks Goku, I appreciate it."

Goku smiled, "No problem, but me and you have to spar sometimes!"

"You got it!"

Nodding, Goku called Natsu and Happy to him, "Okay, Natsu, I will be taking over your training for the next year, are you ready to go?"

Natsu frowned, "Gildarts won't be coming with us?"

Gildarts shook his head, "Natsu, I have a mission I have to finish, so you'll be training without me."

Natsu frowned, "But-"

Gildarts sighed as he walked toward Natsu and pulled the young man into a hug, "Natsu, over the past years, you have made me so proud. You have grown stronger than I could ever have imagined. You… you're the son I never had and I am so proud of you, that why I know you can do this without me."

Natsu nodded, struggling to keep the tears from falling as he hugged the man he considered a father. As Gildarts let him go, Natsu collected himself before grinning, "Don't worry Gildarts, I won't let you down."

Gildarts smiled, "I know you won't."

Nodding, Natsu grabbed Goku outstretched hand as Happy transformed into his smaller form and sat on his shoulder. Goku put his index and middle finger to his forward, and in flash, the trio was gone.

Gildarts sighed as he foster son continued his training without him, Gildarts turned to leave, putting his fingers to hips lips and whistling. He watched as a small, yellow, cloud, floated down from the sky and stopped in front of him.

"Okay," said Gildarts, as he stepped on the cloud, "It's time to go investigate those Acnologia sighting." and with a push, the cloud took off, taking Gildarts into the horizon.

For the next two years, Natsu and Happy would not be seen, as they trained heavily to use the powers they received.

And when they return, the land of Fiore will never be the same.

And the beautiful, women of Fiore will have a very perverted Dragon Slayer on their hands when Natsu did return.

The End…

Pysche,

This is just the first chapter. Next time, Natsu and Happy return, Erza is pissed, Mirajane is randy, Cana wants revenge, and Jellal is on the move.

Anyway, Omake time:

"Laxus, please!" begged Mirajane as Phantom Heart continued to attack the guild.

Laxus scoffed, "If you want me to help, you know what I want."

Mirajane sighed as she reached into her cleavage, Laxus watching eagerly, and pulled out…

A tray of brownies.

"Laxus, if you come and help us, I give you this whole tray of brownies….Laxus?"

Mirajane was confused as the image of Laxus in the crystal ball was no longer there.

"BROWNIES!"

Outside:

Cana blinked as she fought off the attacking dark guild members, "What was that?"

"Does anyone else hear music playing?" asked Macao, "And is that Laxus… singing?"

Everyone stopped fighting and indeed they did hear singing.

"Look!" yelled Wakaba, "From the North!" as he pointed at a lightning bolt flying at them.

_Laxus, FUCK YEAH!_

_Coming again, to save the mother fucking day yeah,_

_Laxus, FUCK YEAH!_

_Freedom is the only way yeah,_

_Terrorist your game is through cause now you have to answer too,_

_Laxus, FUCK YEAH!_

_So lick my butt, and suck on my balls,_

_Laxus, FUCK YEAH!_

_What you going to do when we come for you now._

"Oh God, Why?" said Cana as Laxus stopped in front of the guild, hovering between the guild and Phantom Heart.

"You!" roared Laxus, "How dare you come and try to attack my guild! I will make you pay for that!"

Laxus roared as his magic grew, the sky darkening as lightning surrounded his body as his Dragon Force activated. Laxus held his arm and legs out as his magic continued to grow.

"You want to feel the wrath of Fairy Tail, then stand RIGHT THERE!"

Laxus screamed as the weaker buildings surrounding him began to crumble, kicking dust into the roaring winds.

"Dear God!" cried Wakaba, as he watched the destruction in response to Laxus power, "He is going to destroy us all!"

Laxus then placed he hands together; his power collected into a ball of energy the size of his head.

"Jose! You will RESPECT MY MOTHERFUCKING AUTHRORITY!"

* * *

In the next universe:

A little boy stopped walking as he looked toward the East.

"I will," he said, "I will respect your motherfucking authority."

"Cartman! Stop taking a snack break and move your fatass!"

"You go to hell, Kyle! You go to hell and you die, you goddamn stinking jew!"

* * *

Back with Laxus:

(Cue Vegeta Final Flash Theme)

Cana watched in horror as Laxus finished charging his attack.

Macao turned away to run, "Cana! The piano is playing! Let's go!"

With his attack completed Laxus let it loose,

"LIGHTNING DRAGON'S FINAL FLASH!"

Or when translated into to badass:

Fuck **EVERYTHING** in that direction.

The ball of magic in Laxus's hand exploded outward, growing in size as it approached Phantom Guild.

As the mages of the guild saw the attack approach, Gajeel had one thing to say,

"Fuck this!" as he and Juvia bailed.

As Jose watched the attack get closer, he only had one thing to say,

"Oh, shit!"

Before the attack collided with his guild, erasing him and the guild from the face of the planet, and half of Magnolia that was behind the guild, as the attack continued into the horizon.

* * *

Out in the ocean:

Jellal smiled as the plans for the Tower of Heaven was well on track to being completed soon. Apparently happy slaves were a lot better than tortured slaves.

Apparently, Casual Friday was a hit.

As he went back to going over his schedule, he noticed something out of the corner of his eye.

As he turned, he saw a very large, yellow, beam of energy coming right at him.

As the attack came closer, Jellal decided on the base choice of words for his situation,

"Oh, shit!"

As the attack consumed him and the Tower of Heaven, obliterating them and continuing on its path.

* * *

The next universe over:

Blackbeard laughed as he faced off against Portgas D. Ace, "Ace! I'll offer you one more chance! Join my crew or- What the hell is that? Oh Shit!" yelled Blackbeard, as Laxus's Final Flash washed over him, destroying him and continuing on its journey.

Ace gaped at the utter destruction of the attack, before shrugging and going back on his way. Now, in canon, this would be the moment where Ace would be captured and given to the marines, where Luffy would go and save him, but ending up sacrificing 20 years of his life and Ace dying by Akainu's hands.

This is fanon.

Since Ace never was captured, Luffy didn't have to rush to leave Amazon Lily, meaning that Boa Hancock would have more time… to get to _know_ Luffy.

* * *

Three years laters:

The Strawhat Pirates ship docked at the harbor of Amazon Lily. They didn't know why their captain decided to push back their reunion for three years, but they used the time to train and get stronger.

As the filed off the ship, a three little girl with jet black hair wearing a red shirt with black shorts ran over to them, "Are you the Strawhat Gang?" she asked cutely.

Nami smiled as she knelt down for the girl, "Yes, we are. How can we help you, sweetie?" the little girl smiled, "My daddy want's to talk to you. Follow me!" as she took off, the confused pirates following her.

* * *

Ten minutes later:

"YOU WHAT?"

Luffy grinned as he smiled at his crew, his wife, Boa Hancock, happily seated in his lap.

"Yep, I have my own harem!"

Sanji burst down in tears, "Luffy, you bastard! I don't know if I should hate you or respect your awesomeness!"

"Wow!" said Zoro, "That is pretty cool!" as Chopper, Franky, Usopp, and Brooks nodded.

"Thanks you guys!"

"Don't encourage him!" screeched Nami. "He has every women on this island as a member of his harem!"

"Not all of them." said Hancock, "Only the beautiful women are a part of their harem, there is Margaret, Alvida, Vivi-"

"How did you get Alvida and Vivi?" yelled Nami.

Luffy grinned, "Wanting only the best and the beautiful, Hancock here wrote them a letter and they agreed. Hancock is still my alpha wife though because she is so awesome!" said Luffy as he kissed Hancock on the lips, causing her to swoon.

Robin raised a hand, "Are you still accepting members?"

"ROBIN!" screeched Sanji and Nami.

"What? Luffy is surprisingly handsome, strong enough to protect has family, can give me children, and is on track to be the Pirate King; I think this would be a good thing for me to join."

"I am glad to hear that, Robin." said Hancock as she motioned for her snake to bring Robin some papers, then we have to do a physical test."

"Wait a second! How did Luffy understand a woman's affection anyway?" asked Sanji.

"Oh, Hancock took a bath with me, then she took my penis and put it in her mouth, and I thought if felt really good, so-"

"GAAAH, you bastard! How did you get all these beautiful women while I ended up on an island of transvestite?" cried Sanji as he ran away to cry at the unfairness of the situation.

Zoro shrugged and walked away, "Well, if we are starting families, I guess I can find Tashigi and try that out. It would be pretty cool to have a kid to pass my swords to when I kick the bucket."

"Aye!" agreed Franky, "I am going to find a mad scientist and get to work on my Franky Jr.!"

"Maybe I can find a woman that I can give my bone to. Hoohoo! Bone joke!" cackled Brookes as he walked away, followed by Usopp and Chopper.

Luffy waved at his friends, "Okay you guys, meet up in one year so we can continue our adventure!"

"Luffy, Hancock. I have finished my forms; will we start the physical evaluations now?"

"Yeah, Robin! Just take you clothes off while I take mine off." said Luffy as Hancock hopped off his lap.

Nami just stood there shocked at what had happened when Hancock walked over to her, "We always have room in the harem for one more." as she held out a form.

Nami was unsure of what to do, until she saw Robin and Luffy going at it and shrugged, what did she have to lose?

"Where do I sign?"

* * *

Back with Laxus's Final Flash:

Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura with their comrades braced themselves for the Ten-tails attack.

As the monster gatherered powers, Madara caught a glimpse of something out of the corner of his eye, "What the heck is that?"

As the monster looked to the right, he noticed the beam of pure awesomeness surging at it.

It then made a series of roars and growls that could be translated as, "Oh, Shit!" before the beam hit and vaporized the beast.

With their trump card gone, Obito and Madara was unsure of what to do, as their respective enemies, Minato and Hashirama stood in front of them.

As the four squared off, Sasuke nodded, "Well now that that's finished, I could continue with my goal to be hokage."

Naruto frozed and looked at Sasuke, "Wait, you're serious about that?"

"Yes."

"Even though everyone hates you?"

"Yes."

"Despite the fact that you are a missing nin?"

"Yes."

"Even though it is my dream, that I have spent my entire life working up to?

"Yes."

"Even though it is the worst character development in all of anime history?"

"Yes."

Naruto nodded, "Okay!" and grabbed Sasuke and threw him into the beam of energy, erasing the Uchiha from the face of the planet.

"Does anyone else think they can be the Hokage?" asked Naruto as his Kyuubi Cloak went back up in his anger.

Everyone quickly shook their heads.

Naruto sighed, "You know, maybe I'll let somebody else worry about being the hokage. I mean, I spent my entire life being an idiot or training to fight super powered ninjas. Maybe I could take a break, have a relationship, with a girl and have wild sex with her?"

"Really!" screamed Hinata as she pushed Sakura aside and stood in front of Naruto, "You really want a relationship with lots of sex?"

Naruto nodded, "Sure, why not?"

Hinata grinned, before grabbing her vest and ripping and her shirt to shreds, leaving her glorious bosom out for all to see.

Naruto eyes widen, "Holy, crap! Those things are huge!" before Hinata grabbed his hands and put them on her chest.

"Naruto." whispered Hinata, "I want you to ruin me, so that the only man that could every satisfy me will be you" before she pulled him into a kiss.

Minato took a chance to stop his curb stomping of Obito to nod with pride as his son had sex with the super hot Hyuuga girl, wiping a tear from his eye, "Naruto! You are having sex with a girl on a battlefield after you destroyed your enemy! You truly are my son!"

Minato then realized something, "Oh shit! I forgot!" he then took out one of his special kunai and stab Obito in the stomach with it before slapping a seal on his face so he could track him, "I'll be back to kill you later." as he vanished, leaving a whimpering Tobi behind.

* * *

In Hueco Mundo:

"On the agenda," started Aizen, "First and foremost, there will be no Casual Friday." receiving groans from the room.

"Dickhead!"

"I heard that Grimmjow, and for that, no catnip for three weeks!" yelled Aizen, "Now back to matters at hand-"

BOOM!

"What the?" said Barrigan, as they noticed a figured walked through the hole where the door once was.

In the doorway stood an angry, Kyuubi Chakra mode, Minato; with a rasengan in each hand.

"Hey, Aizen! I took me a while but I knew I find you! First, you eat my soul, then you draw your strength from my soul, third you kidnap my wife's soul and make her into an espada. I guess no one told you this, but here is a good rule of thumb… you do NOT fuck with me!" roared Minato, before he vanished.

As Minato reappeared in front of Aizen, Aizen would have screamed.

If he didn't have a rasengan shoved down his throat.

* * *

In the basement:

Orihime stared at the red haired woman sitting across from her in confusion. The woman was obviously an espada, with the '1' tattooed on the side of her neck, the white vest that stopped right below her breast, leaving her stomach exposed showing her hollow hole where her belly button should be, and a long skirt that stopped at her ankles, leaving her feet bare. Her hollow mask consisted of three bone fragments on each cheek, which made her seem like a fox when she smiled.

"So, who are you again?"

The woman smiled, giving off the appearance of a fox, "My name is Uzumaki Kushina, ex-espada #1."

"Why are you here?"

"I don't care much for listening to narcissistic assholes, like Aizen."

"Didn't he try to make you follow him?"

"He tried. Had Nnoitra attack me to put me in my place. I'm the reason he hates women so much, but I guess any man would hate women if they cut his dick off and shoved it up his ass."

Before Orihime could respond, an explosion rocked the room, followed by the sounds of screaming.

High pitch girly screaming.

Which was funny because the male arracners outnumbered the females.

After a while the explosions died down, followed by the sounds of footsteps. Orihime waited with bated breath as the footsteps stopped at the door of her and Kushina's cell, before the door slowly opened, and in walked a blond haired man. The man had spikey blond hair, with a lightning bolt under his right eye, with a '0' tattooed on his left cheek, he wore an open vest, showing his muscular torso, with his hollow hole where his heart should be. He wore a pair of white gi pants with white sandals.

Orihime was confused as she had never seen this hollow before, but apparently Kushina had.

"MINATO!" she screamed as she leapt into her husband arms, kissing him across his face.

"How did you get here? How are you a hollow? Why do I feel some of the Kyuubi's power inside of you?"

Minato grinned, "Long story short, I got resurrected, killed Aizen and took the Hogyuko and become an espada, and merged with the Kyuubi chakra I had when I sealed part of it into me, since Naruto didn't need it."

Satisfied, Kushina resumed kissing her husband, planning on showing him exactly how 'happy' she was too she him.

"Uh, Kushina." said Minato as Kushina worked his vest off and began working on his pants, "What about your friend?"

Kushina looked back at the blushing Orihime before going back to work.

"Let her watch!"

* * *

When Ichigo and his friends finally got there, Ichigo was extremely confused. Instead of a faceoff with the espada, he walked in on a blond man plowing a screaming red head doggy style, a destroyed castle, and a flustered Orihime. Orihime then went and healed Nel, reverting her back to her adult self, before pulling him into a kiss and working her top and his pants off, before inviting Nel to join, which she happily did.

He may have been extremely confused, but he was extremely happy as well.

* * *

Meanwhile back at Fairy Tail:

Laxus gorged himself on brownies, not giving a shit about the destructive magic he let loose on the universe.

"So," started Cana, "You let loose an attack that probably killed millions of people, and you don't care at all."

Laxus simply shook his head, still focusing on eating as many brownies as possible.

"You know the guild will have to pay for all this?"

Laxus simply shrugged.

Cana frowned, "You are a real asshole sometimes Laxus."

"At least I have brownies."

* * *

Omake #2:

Erza was happy and angry.

Why you ask?

Natsu had finally come back after his 14-year training trip.

Why she was angry?

Because he brought friends back.

Erza glared at the two women that Natsu introduced as Lightning and Fang, from across the table, which the two returned.

Deciding to state her relationship with Natsu, Erza started a conversation with the two, "I'm Erza, Natsu oldest and trusted friend."

"We're his lovers." said Fang

"I am his personal confidant."

"We provide advice on difficult issues for Natsu." said Fang.

"I am able to use magic to change into different unique weapons to defeat my opponents."

"We use magic to summon elements as well as using unique weapons and summons to defeat our enemies."

Erza glared at the two, "I don't like you two very much."

"The feelings mutual." growled Fang, as lightning sparked between the trio's glare starting an explosion of jealous, feminine fury that manifest into fire around the three.

"Oh, god! The guild is on fire!" screamed Gray.

"Quick, save yourselves!" screamed Levy as the fire of feminine fury spread.

Mirajane laughed as she watched the three, "I'm glad I don't have to worry about competing against a girl who is basically me with a different outfit for Natsu's affection."

"Excuse me?"

Mirajane turned around to face a woman with bright green hair with a pair of black wing coming out of the top and a larger pair coming out of her back. She wore an insanely, skimpy, leotard, that did nothing to cover her large breast, with purple tights to cover her shapely, legs, with a pair of black boots.

"Hi there. My name is Morrigan Aensland, a beautiful succubus who avoids responsibility by joking around and avoiding roles of leadership and authority. My magical powers are obviously demon based and I had 1/3 of my powers sealed away due to forces outside of my control. I enjoy wearing skimpy outfits and I am currently here to find a man named Natsu Dragneel, a man who caught my attention and affection."

Mirajane blinked as she stared at the women, before glaring at her, "I don't like you very much."

Morrigan returned the glare, "The feeling is mutual." as flames of righteous, feminine fury and jealously raged around the two.

"Dear God," screamed Laxus, "Where is all of this fire coming from?"

It was safe to say that the guild was burned to ashes as the women battle it out.

* * *

Omake #3 What happened to Wendy:

Young Edward and Alphonso Elric hid behind a tree as they watched their teacher, Izumi Curtis and her husband, talk to a large white dragon.

For most, this would be weird. But the Elric brothers knew that this was just the norm for Izumu Curtis.

Said woman frowned as she looked at the dragon, "So, Grandeeney, you want us to do what again?"

"I want you to take care of my daughter, Wendy."

"Why, exactly?"

"So, the other dragons and I will have to leave, and I want to make sure she is taken care of while I am gone."

Izumi frowned, "Well, I already have two boys I am watching, WHO ARE GOING TO PAY FOR SPYING ON ME!" roared Izumi as she picked up a rock and hurled it at the boys hiding spot, hitting Edward on the head.

Grandeeney nodded, expecting such. "Time to use the secret weapon." Grandeeney then used her tail to reach up her back and pick up a 4 year old sleeping Wendy. She slowly placed the girl down in front of Izumi husband, knowing he was the weaker link.

Sig frowned as the little girl was place in front of him, slowing beginning to wake. She yawned cutely as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes before looking up at Sig.

"Daddy?" she asked.

That was the straw that broke the camel's back.

Sig eyes began to water, before he broke down in tears, "MY BABY!" he cried as he picked the little girl up and hugged her, which he happily returned.

"You see, Izumi. Sig already loves her." as she pointed to the grown man as he fawned over Wendy, hugging her for all he was worth.

"I'm still not sure." said Izumi, her stance beginning to waver.

Sig turned to face Izumi, still holding Wendy in his arms, "Please dear, look at her." as he held Wendy out toward Izumi.

Wendy turned on the biggest puppy dog eyes she could, as she whispered, "Mommy." and held her arms outs.

Izumi broke faster than a fatman's zipper at an all-you-can-eat buffet.

"MY BABY!" cried Izumi, as she pulled Wendy from sigs arm and hugged the little girl.

Grandeeney grinned, she was a freaking genius.

* * *

Omake 1 came up because America, Fuck Yeah, only with Laxus instead of America sounds like something Laxus would do and to give a shout out to two of my favored animes. Omake #2 is due to how I think some of the clashes amongst the girls would go down, as I doubt even if all the girls got along, they would still clash over Natsu's affection. Omake #3 will definitely carry into the story and maybe some of the characters from the crossovers might follow Natsu back to Fairy Tail, for instance, Natsu still think's Samus is a guy, so it will be funny to see how that relationship is going to go. Anyway, feel free to leave a review, and I hope you enjoyed.

Omni Out.


End file.
